Men, if your wife has left you, she has felt hurt for a long time. It is likely that she sought to communicate her feelings, but you interpreted the passion of her words as whiny complaints or attacks. You responded not with understanding or compassion, but with defensiveness and correction as you warded off the verbal rocks she was throwing. This left her feeling alone, unheard, and unvalued.
1. Habit: A big fat vacuum exists after a breakup. Something (someone) is missing, and you have to readjust to being on your own, without a partner to share things with. This creates an acute yearning for that person, which is easy to label as “it must have been love!”
Did you or someone you know dump their ex only to have regrets weeks or months after the separation? You broke up but now miss your ex and would be willing to do anything to get them back? The grass always seems greener on the other side of the fence, but the reality…
Five months later he met me and I thought we had a very healthy, loving relationship. It lasted 8 months. The problem is ever since he left his ex, he has had no friends and he doesn’t have much family to speak of. Ever since I met him, I’ve been the only person in his life he was close to. This is why I think I was so hesitant to cut him out of my life after our breakup. I knew if I didn’t stay his friend, he would have literally nobody.
Time will actually work in your favor because the odds are that your ex’s new relationship will be just a rebound; in time your ex will figure out that the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence and that you were not the source of all of their unhappiness!
You already replied to the first part and then again to the second part of my situation, but I have an important update… This is LONG distance. I Have just moved to a new city and the earliest I could get back to see her would be the end of August… how should I proceed with your advice given the important fact that I have a new job for 3 years in a different city (2 hour flight apart from her). We talked about distance before we broke up and she said she wasn’t happy doing it for 3 years, and would possibly do it to start off but would want to move in… Then we had the ugly breakup I describe below. I would greatly appreciate input!! PLEASE. This is the first part, followed by your reply, and then the second part followed by your second reply.
You may hear from mutual friends that he called you a bad name/s or you may get the feeling that he hates you or wants nothing to do with you. Don’t worry, he is emotional and doesn’t mean it. Besides, after 30 days he will change his tune.
Whatever she said, it will almost certainly have NOT given you any clue as to what exactly went wrong. This is typical of women, but I’m a fellow guy who’s on your side, and I can give it to you straight, so here goes…
To a casual observer that may sound really risky but personally I love women with that belief that after they get their boyfriend back they will be with him forever. Those are the type of women who work really hard to create that NEW and BETTER relationship.
Although dating other women can help you in great way but it is not necessary step. It is ok if you don’t find any girl for dating. There are many other ways such as hanging out with your friends, working out in GYM, discovering new places in your city etc that can help you in moving on.
I am 49 years old and I was in a relationship for almost four years. My ex boyfriend left me because I get upset with him about things that many times didn’t make sense to argue about. He is 51 years old and doesn’t like to argue about anything. I treated him bad several times. I regret each one of them and apologized from the bottom of my heart because it hurt me hurting him. I regret every time I did it. The first time he told me that he need it a separation to think things out and after a month I called him and we got back together. Then when I fell in the same behavior he just stopped calling me and then I called him and we got back together. Then we decided to go to a therapist for almost 6 to eight months. I improved my behavior and I told him that we should work in our relationship in our own because I felt that we were relying too much in the therapist and that we had to have someone as a mediator to have a good relationship. He agrees and after some time I was acting in the same way. Last September a got mad about him not finding an address while we were going to another state, he felt offended and didn’t want to talk to me again. As usual I asked him to forgive me and he told me that he needed it think things out. I told him that I’ll respect whatever he’ll decide, that I didn’t know why I acted that way, however he told me that he was going to call me. I didn’t contact him hoping he will do it, but he never did it.