Remember that if you’re even remotely considering reuniting with an ex who has serious issues like addictions of any kind, or who inflicted physical or emotional abuse on you or your children — you must have outside help via therapy, support groups, etc. Physical abuse, especially, can escalate to the point where you are taking your own life into your hands if you keep going back. And abusers tend to be very good at making empty promises.

These 3 steps are based on simple psychological techniques that work extremely well after a breakup. It’s not some mind tricks and cheap gimmicks that you will use to trick your ex into getting back together. If you are planning to trick your ex or force them into being with you, you are just going to end up in another miserable breakup. This guide will teach you how to start a new relationship with your ex; a relationship that actually has a chance of being a long lasting healthy relationship. Not the same old one which ended in this breakup.

I have been blessed to be married to a very insightful, very articulate woman for more than 35 years. In that time she has thoroughly explained to me how women think. In the early years I shared with her letters of repentance that I received from husbands and she would read them and explain to me why they would further alienate their wives. With her coaching, I have since received and critiqued multitudes of letters of repentance from men, yet have never received one that wouldn’t have been damaging had a husband sent it to his wife.

When you pick her call, number one rule is, don’t be angry, depress or rude to her. If she calls you or visits your workplace, then make sure to act happy and cheerful. Acting this way will demonstrate your higher value. Again, this will increase her ‘fear of loss’ feeling and make you look like you have moved on.

This one is obvious. The more you text or call your ex; the less attractive you will look to her. Even if you act all casual when you text her; you will still come off as needy as your ex will see right through it.

So, the big take away that I want you to get from this section is that your ultimate goal assuming this process works for you is that you are discarding your old relationship and creating a new one that is stronger.

Make him jealous (optional). This doesn’t work for everyone, but if you think that having your ex see you with another guy, or just flirting with a group of guys, will make him want to be around you even more than go for it. This doesn’t mean you should get another boyfriend just to make him jealous. Just let him see you flirting, tossing your hair back, or even getting on the dance floor with another guy or two.

Alright mates, this is the final boss. The moment you have been waiting for. Because when you meet her, you will have the ultimate opportunity to show her how much you have changed and how things will be different this time.

After being together for just shy of 7 years my boyfriend decided to end our relationship. I knew things hadn’t been right for a couple of weeks leading up to this, he had become pretty distant, wasn’t showing me any affection but we weren’t arguing and everything else in the relationship was good. I eventually confronted him, and we had a conversation that lead to him admitting that whilst he still loved me his feelings towards me had changed and he needed his own space to work on himself. I moved out utterly heartbroken as I couldn’t believe that after 7 years it would be that easy to end everything!

Remember, your ex will not make you happy, only you can make yourself happy. And the only way you can do it is by understanding yourself, loving yourself, appreciating what you have, understanding your purpose in life and pursuing it.

Once four weeks of No Contact is complete you can now contact her at this point. In the majority of cases, she will contact but if she doesn’t then it is safe to call her now. However, make sure you have waited for minimum four weeks. Sometimes you have to wait longer than this depending on how needy and desperate you behave during your breakup.

when she came back for the Xmas/new year, we saw, she asked me to bring over food and drinks on Xmas day, I did, I kissed her but lightly, and said our good nights, cause I didn’t want to push it far.

Hang in there, and focus on recovering right now. If you want her back in your life, you’re going to have to make changes to yourself especially on areas she didn’t like. You should take some time off from her and distance yourself right now to work on your own issues, before trying anything again.

Unlike you, dear reader, I don’t have any ex-girlfriends. But if I did have an ex-girlfriend to get back with, I imagine I’d do so because it would feel easy. I imagine it would be like settling into an old groove in an old record that I hadn’t heard in a long time. I imagine it would be a very bad idea. But what if it wasn’t? What if it was exactly the right thing to do? Because there are different kinds of exes, is the whole thing.

If you contact her, talk with her like an old friend. Don’t feel desperate and don’t show any hint of neediness from your side. Act like you are completely fine and finally realize breakup was the best thing happened to you.

To be entirely honest, there’s always a chance, but in long distance relationships, that chance can be a lot slimmer. If she’s dating someone new and he is in the same country as her, it’s very hard for you to compete because anything you do without being in close proximity can easily be misinterpreted. I would honestly suggest that you be fair to yourself and not contact her for the time being. Practice the No Contact rule for a period before considering anything again.

Wrong. The truth is a girlfriend wants to be important to you but she also needs you to have other activities in your life that don’t include her. Because, if you’d made your life all about her, it’d be a case where she sees that she’s 100% won you over, and women get bored of men they’ve won over fully. Why? It makes them think maybe they could do better, and that’s the last thing you want your ex thinking.

I don’t believe she has moved on.. after our break up we were still incontact an evan meet up for dinner ect. Its been just over 2 weeks she has asked me to concentrate on myself and make successful positive changes and she not making commitments for a relationship at this stage. How long should u wait until i make contact via email and how to write a letter and what to say? Regards Theo

Contact your ex-partner after a period of time. Rather than aggressively call or text your partner several times soon after the break up, take some time to think about the relationship and to recover from any high emotions you may be experiencing. When you feel you might be ready to reach out to your ex-partner, do so with one call or one text. Explain that you hope your ex-partner is well and that you have taken this time apart to work on your issues with the help of a therapist.[4]

You have to make yourself scarce if you want to be together with your ex (explained in STEP 2 of this plan). Texting them all the time and calling them just shows that you are too needy and don’t have anything else to do. As I said before, being needy is unattractive and you want to avoid this at all cost.

Another factor to consider is…was there financial trouble, which tore you apart? If so, you can possibly figure out a way to solve this. It really depends on the specific situation if you are willing to compromise and make changes.

I feel all of those thing because I love my ex girlfriend. She is the mother of my child. I want her back so bad because she was my first love. Yeah I was a player back in the day, but when I started dating her I change a lot and I love her so much that I tear myself apart and I eat but it doesn’t stay down.

A strong healthy relationship can be one of the best things in life for good health and wellbeing. Read the following article for some great advice on keeping your relationship alive>>http://www.helpguide.org/mental/improve_relationships.htm<< Before you can display your growth and showcase all that you’ve become it is necessary to establish a platform of communication. Quite simply it is impossible for you to get back with someone that you love if the two of you are not in touch. It may sound simple but I’ve encountered countless situation where people would play out different scenarios in their heads and create a mental block or come to the conclusion that they cannot get back with their ex even before having touched base with them again! Getting back with an ex after years apart is possible but you must first be able to talk to that person; not a just sporadic conversation here of there. You need to really be back in touch and create what I like to call an open platform of communication where you feel comfortable to reach out to someone without second guessing yourself. Does it even make sense to chase her after her then??? She says she still loves me and always will, especially as I was her first sex partner. But wouldn’t her have other partners over that time make her move on and forget about me? Doesn’t matter who broke the relationship first, the truth is both of you get many raw feelings, and it is important to recognize that. You need to allow yourself to do whatever to want to do to let the emotions come out. However, it is important to set a time limit. After that period, you have to forget everything and process forward to recover from it. These are the ones who walk around just ahead of us, just out of reach, the ones we think we spot on the train and our heart lurches before we realize that’s it not them. It’s a dog. It’s not them. It’s just a dog in a raincoat. And them we go home alone. [otp_overlay]