The big takeaway that I want you to get from this is that you have to look like you take care of yourself. The second that you stop looking that way is the second you appear less attractive than you really can be.

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It will help keep your mind off your ex (probably)- When you are busy you have less time to mope around or think about your ex. Instead of being completely miserable and depressed you are doing something constructive and dare I say having a bit of fun?

In addition to working on recreating attraction you should examine your relationship and look for what other contributing factors led to the break up and how you can overcome/prevent/eliminate these things.

Have you started a relationship with someone, but have not shared a kiss yet? Are you afraid to make the first move? Kissing can be fun and exciting, but also intense and intimate. However, it is nothing to be afraid of. With a little effort, you and your special someone will be kissing in no time.

Change your thinking about this entire situation. Just give up control, accept the possibility that you may not get them back, stop worrying about the outcome, and relax – if you are following my advice you have already improved your chances of getting them back – take comfort in that if nothing else.

Think twice if he’s already in another relationship. If your ex boyfriend has started dating someone else, consider him off-limits. Don’t become that person who won’t leave her ex alone after he has moved on. If he’s happy with someone else, you could end up hurting him, his new partner, and yourself by trying to interfere.

You’re probably now feeling very defeated. Many of your tactics for keeping your girl sweet have unfortunately worked against you, and this leaves you asking, “So what the f*** do I do?! How can I get my ex-girlfriend back?”

#3 Give her space. Don’t contact her desperately after you two break up. You need to give her the space she needs. If she dumped you, there’s a reason why. Now, she’s most likely mentally drained and exhausted, so leave her, she needs to recharge her batteries.

Although you say you don’t want a serious relationship and only want a friends with benefit type of thing, it seems to me that your emotions say otherwise, or else you wouldn’t really mind or care if he was talking to others or had walls since it should not matter. I think that you need to be more aware as well if you’re trying to push someone away, as sometimes we do that in the form of picking fights or faults with our partner. I suggest just focusing on yourself first to work on whatever issues you may have and build yourself back up before considering any relationship.

Chances are, you’ve already made at least one of these mistakes after the breakup. Don’t worry, even the wisest monks in the Himalayas and masters of psychology from Harvard usually end up making these mistakes after a breakup. It’s just in the nature of human beings to try and hold on to something that is precious to them. So don’t beat yourself over it. The most important thing for you to do right now is to realize that these mistakes will not help you get him back and stop doing them right away. Move on to the next step of the plan which is going to repair all the damage you’ve caused till now.

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Text messages should ideally be used after sending the hand written letter to build up attraction. You can even skip the hand written letter and move on directly to text messages. You know your situation and your ex better than anyone, so it’s your decision whether or not you want to use just text messages, just the letter, or both. But I highly recommend you use either one or both of these before actually calling your ex.

GREETINGS TO EVERYONE HERE. I WANT YOU GUYS TO KNOW THAT HAPPINESS THEY SAID MEANS A LOT IN LIFE AND LIVING WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE IS THE GREATEST THING TO DO IN LIFE WHEN IT COME TO RELATIONSHIP ISSUE. I WAS ONCE IN A BREAK UP RELATIONSHIP BUT TODAY I AM HAPPY AND LIVING A PREMIUM LIFE WITH MY EX THROUGH THE HELP OF HIGH PRIEST TOKUBO. HIGH PRIEST TOKUBO IS A GREAT SPELL CASTER WHO I CAME ACCROSS HIS EMAIL ONLINE THROUGH A WOMAN COMMENT ONLINE ON HOW HIGH PRIEST TOKUBO HELPED HER TO GET HER HUSBAND BACK. IF YOU ARE REALLY PASSING THROUGH DIFFICULTY IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP NOW OR YOU WANT YOUR EX BACK CONTACT HIGH PREIST TOKUBO VIA HIS DETAILS ON;highpriesttokubo @ gmail. com,,,,,DO NOT WASTE TIME IN CONTACTING HIM BECAUSE DELAY THEY SAID IS DANGERIOUS.

Once you get the date it is all up to you to really make her feel for you. By the time the date ends if she is left with this feeling of happiness and excitement then you really did your job and you are well on your way to getting her back.

The goal of the first contact is just to get her think about you positively. Show her how well you’re doing and that you’re back to the man that she fell in love with in the first place. This is important.

I need help! My boyfriend and I just broke up 4 days ago and we were together for 4 months but I’ve known him since we were in 6th grade (I’m a freshman now) and since then, he has liked me. So, a month ago I found out that he liked my best friend and I broke up with him. A week later, we started dating again. The problem is that I’m bipolar and I get jealous really easy, especially when he’s around the girls that he use to like. When we started dating again, we decided to be honest to each other no matter how bad it was and I did my job, from the beginning of our relationship, I told him I still had little feelings for my ex but it didn’t matter because he goes to another school. We promised each other that I wasn’t going to text my ex anymore and he wasn’t going to talk to my friend or even get near her. 4 days ago, my best friend and other 2 girls were in a group and I guess he was waiting for his friend but I didn’t care, I wanted him away from her. I told him to move and he kept saying he was waiting for his friend. I started counting till 5 and I turned around and left. He followed me but I ignored him. I knew that if I talked to him, I was going to break up with him and I didn’t want that, so I left. I texted him 30 minutes later explaining why I was mad and why I ignored him, I even apologized and all I got was “…. I dunno…” At that moment, I knew it was over. I begged him not to break up but he wouldn’t take me back. The next day I talked to him, I had to. I told him that… I might be pregnant. I told my mom and she was not okay, I lost all her trust. He also told his mom and she said if I was pregnant, she was going to support him but since I’m not, she doesn’t want us back together. I know he still loves me but I don’t know what to do anymore. Today I found out that he started talking to his ex, so I did the same. This is really affecting me. I did not go to one of my classes today because he has the same class, I also left school early because I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I feel like this is slowly killing me. I feel like I need him! :'( Can someone help me?

I missed her terribly.  I thought about her all the time.  I was anxious to meet someone new, but inevitably (if unfairly) I often compared potential new partners to her.  At any given moment, there are a handful of pieces of driftwood, floating with the currents of the sea, bearing the simple words, “To ****, I miss you” with my initials underneath.

hi, I’m a lesbian and was with this girl for two years we were so attached to each other and stuff, but then my friend ruin it, she lied to her and told her stuff about me that wasn’t even true. after that my ex replaced me with one of her friends she said their just friends, i told her not to talk to her she didn’t listen and things started going wrong then we broke up. a month later she came back I never stopped thinking about her. she said misses me and that she needed time. but she treats me like crap now, she calls me names.. then when I’m sad she asks why. I don’t understand her, she even asked me out again but said it in a way that disgusted me. I didn’t answer! I really want her back, please tell me what to do? and how to get her back I can’t live without her please help me.. I want to win her heart again please help???”

Hi Ryan, dude where are you? I really need your help. I’m really trying to not a mistake here man. It’s been maybe half a month since the NC.. it’s been working like a charm.. couples days ago my ex sees me at work and days I looked good and like I’ve changed..also that I was happy. She text me that same day saying how much she missed my presence in her life, how she missed her best friend. I didn’t respond and then she text me a photo saying remember the good times.. also said she was going thru her phone deleting pics of us and didn’t know which to keep. I then replied I miss you too. We started chatting back in forth and remembering all the good things. She texted me all night. Then the next day says she loves me and misses.. I tell her too. We talked a lot about how much we loved one another. Don’t know if that was a right move ..yesterday she sends me a message at work that was a song. “Baby while were young , let’s do what we want, I want you, you’re mine and I don’t care who’s know it, I’m down for you” just a few things she sent me! I’m confused because after work I waited to talk with her but she ran out quickly and I’m sure when went to meet up with someone else. She didn’t go home last night. She also didn’t text me anymore.. so confusing what’s going on.. not sure what to do or expect! Please help dude! I really want her back and I can’t tell if I messed up the NC rule. She definitely has been seeing someone else lately. Please write me back soon.. she wants to me up tonight to go eat. Don’t know if I should go

Ultimately, getting her back will hinge upon how well you can read your ex’s emotional patterns. With just the right timing, you can approach your ex when she’s most susceptible and open to the idea of getting back together again.

My bf and I were together for a year and a half.. What basically broke us up was I got injured and was unable to walk so I had to have surgery and I was also put on hormones which made me feel insanely depressed.. Since I couldn’t walk, I couldn’t go see friends or family and for 3 months while I was recovering, the only person I really saw was him, so when he’d leave to go to work I would cry because I know that I would be alone for 10 hours.. things just got worse from there.. since I couldn’t move, I just stayed on bed-rest, so he’d want to go do stuff, but I couldn’t and he would stay, but I knew it bothered him because before I got hurt we would always go places and do things. Then I started to get really insecure, because who wants to sit at home with their partner when all they do is cry and lay in bed? So I started telling him he was going to end up cheating on me (because there was this girl at work that really wanted him, even though she already had a bf).. Eventually all we did was fight and I’d cry, but finally I started to get better and was able to walk around more, but the damage was done. He ended up cheating on me and then he left me for the girl he cheated on me with. They moved in after only a week of being together, but he would call me the second that he would drop her off at work so that we could hang out (I never made a move on him while he was with her, because I feel that it’s wrong, even though she did it to me) They are still together after 8 months, but he seems miserable.. I sent him a picture of our dog we had and a sign saying “happy birthday” and she freaked out on him. She is insanely jealous and he isn’t allowed to talk to other girls, even girls at work. He is their manager and the girls will talk to him and he will tell me how his girlfriend will freak out, even though he didn’t do anything wrong.. she once gauged out pictures of a girl where they work just because she was his friend. We were both there for each other and we became each others best friends, I can tell that our friendship is stronger now then how it was when we were together. I finally told him I love him still and that I want to be with him and he told me that he won’t date me.. he said there were too many problems in our relationship and he thought we didn’t work well together, but I am his best friend and he cares so much about me and doesn’t want to lose me because I am the only one he can count on and the only one who listens to him. I feel like he is just looking at the end of our relationship when things were bad. I think our relationship wasn’t given a fair shot.. we started dating a few months after my best friend and mother died and then I became injured and sick, now I am better and have matured and understand how I was insecure and didn’t handle my emotions well and I am off of the hormones, so I feel like myself again. How do I get him to remember the amazing times? If I’m his best friend and he’s attracted to me, why wouldn’t he date me? I hate my situation so much because all I want is for him to be happy, but it’s so hard watching him be with this other girl because she treats him bad.. so do I just stop talking to him and lose my best friend?

Some people try to be there for their ex. They walk their dog, they show up at their door with some gifts, and other things. This hinders your value, and makes them wish you were gone. Aside from cutting off communication, it’s imperative that you are not visible. You cannot be seen by her, by your own doing. This will create value, as absence makes the heart grow fonder. You’ll force her to think about you, and will not let her have control, you’ll be in control.

Casually hang out with your ex. Do something non-committal like have a drink with friends or play miniature golf, including him or her with others. Make it something friends and first dates alike can do. And whatever it is, keep it fun and skip out on the serious talks for now.

By taking the initiative instead of waiting to be invited out, you’ll show your friends you still care about them. Additionally, you’ll have a greater amount of control over where you go and what you do together, which should help minimize the chances of running into your ex or anything that reminds you of her.

Would that increase, or decrease my chances of getting her back? Wouldn’t it “close the chapter” if I wrote something like that? What do you think? Would it be smart, and then start another 30 days of no contact? I am not sure…