This is such a powerful article, I agree to everything written out in this article. My fiance and I have been on & off for last 2 yrs. We went through an awful breakup 8 months ago and that’s when I learned about LOA. I kept my faith in the process and just like that 2 months after the breakup, I manifested him back. I did change my ways and turned things around 180 degrees in my favor. We even had a pre-engagement ceremony in July and things couldn’t be any more perfect EXCEPT the fights/issues came back. As of two weeks ago I sensed a lot of negative energy and as a result we got into a fight (really bad one) last weekend (Halloween), while we were in the middle of planning our wedding next year. Sure enough I’m in the same spot at 8 mos ago, he has shut me out as always, no contact, no response nothing. Our wedding outfits are being built and our friends and family are super excited about us. I am hurt obviously and there is that slight fear that what if he calls off teh wedding? But like the article said don’t let your fears pave your destiny!
This is the same article ,same exact wording they they tell guys I find it b.s just switching the word him to her. Guys like to be chased unless they found someone they like more and if they like them back . Then they don’t really care what you do I’m assuming girls are the same. It’s a sad world chase catch get bored and release I find this more common for women to get bored and move on. Or cheat and stay in the relationship and keep cheating on the side . They stay married or with someone for benefits of the man’s provisions
hi my ex broke up with me about a week ago, but she still lives with me, we help each other out financially until i get another job after christmas, shes going out meeting new guys now, how should i conduct the no contact rule in my situation? and what should i do whilst shes here?
It should not be toxic, too. Your goal should be to have a better and healthy relationship that will work for the long term. Commit to taking steps that will prevent the two you from committing the mistakes you made in the past.
I understand it can be hard if you have to see your ex at work on a daily basis, however just proceed normally with your life as you normally would and avoid her unless necessary. It’s unavoidable to have to come into contact and continue to talk to her about work related topics, but since she is acting dry, do not engage in any small talk beyond that.
Think about these questions. Don’t be too critical of either him or yourself. All this emotional bullshit, arguing and blaming each other for crap is one of the reasons you might have broken up in the first place.
Sara, you must be secretly working with the good doctor here because that was very good advice. The article itself has spoken to everything I’ve been experiencing and reading your comments has also served to remind me I’m not alone in the current despair. I’m an impatient person when it comes to certain things but I understand that time will likely be my best bet at working through all of this. It was definitely a relationship where I strived to change things about myself to be with her (that I wanted to, not because I felt she would leave me otherwise) and I suppose I hurt because even though I tried, in the end it was not enough. Funnily enough she sounds very much like your ex, not wanting to further commit because it would be too hard for her to make certain changes for us to work. It breaks my heart to think of her not loving me anymore but it is to be expected. I definitely hope to be in your place soon because this depression nonsense is for the birds! (FYI, I’m a counselor myself and it is quite a bummer I can’t follow my own advice when it comes to all of this.)
I have a small feeling that he has felt awkwardness as well and that’s why he has felt safety near the other girl. He can be normal with her and he can joke around her. But with me, he is more reserved. Of course we can joke as well..but it is so different. I haven’t texted him at all after last weekend, well on Thursday evening about something we talked at work but didn’t get reply. I decided I don’t text him any unnecessary texts that he doesn’t think I am still interested. Well..I was but I have started to accept the other girl is more in his life than me.
Not sure about this stiring of jealousy so to speak. I’ve tried to use a little bit of jealosy for my guy to realise I want him to call me as we haven’t spoken for days and also another time to make us ‘official couple’ and it backfired. As these events were near each other he exploded in once about both accusing me of being unloyal. Though my fault was that I simply sent him a screenshot of a guy (whom I talked to while we were on a break with him) who asked me out and I answered I’ve got back with my boyfriend. I said to my guy I was rejecting others while I didn’t even received responce from him. He got even more quiet and few days later after finally asking him was he angry about something he pushed me away saying he didn’t think it would work with me as I was chatting to others. He’s been hurt by an ex gf and is pretty much on the lookout for clues about unloyalty. Maybe for guys who are not that jealous yeah but I wouldn’t use this method any more!
Another tip on how to get over your ex boyfriend is to just accept that you will be upset for a while and allow yourself to grieve. Holding it in and bottling things up won’t make the pain go away, so you may as well get over it with a good, old fashioned cry. You can’t control grief and only time will truly heal it, but you can make sure that it doesn’t rule your life. As each day passes, the grief will become less, so don’t get angry with yourself, just because you feel sad.
Don’t overdo it! You don’t want to scream that you have been looking for attention from him and come off the wrong way. Just wear something you know you look good in but something that you are also comfortable in and could wear out normally.
That’s good Emily, initiate No Contact first and give both parties some space to let go of any negative emotions or thoughts. He may very well be serious about the possibility of working out, but that’s definitely not something that can be achieved right now.
Welcome to your breakup! It hurts like hell, doesn’t it? Your body just goes numb; this is the lowest low you’ve ever felt in your entire life. Everything’s so gloomy, and you can’t see past today. If you do, it’s scary stuff — a life devoid of meaning and happiness.
Again, showing her that she’s got you 100% by the balls like this will make her bored, which equates to reduced attraction that contributes to a break up. It’ll also indicate to her that you have no other viable dating options (because if you did have such options, why would you be so concerned with stressing your commitment?).