Once four weeks of No Contact is complete you can now contact her at this point. In the majority of cases, she will contact but if she doesn’t then it is safe to call her now. However, make sure you have waited for minimum four weeks. Sometimes you have to wait longer than this depending on how needy and desperate you behave during your breakup.

Everything you do is crucial, from the moment your ex breaks up with you to the moment you wrap your arms back around her again. In between, there are a LOTS of big mistakes to make. Commit too many errors, and you’ll lose your one chance at ever dating your ex again.

my names olly im 18 and i might be going to jail for 6 months for getting forced into a robbery long story i know, but thats obviously why im not here im here to ask for some serious advice im in total love with this girl,shes the most beautiful woman on the planet to me and we used to love eachother so much 1 year and 6 months we were together i was stupid and took it for granted at first so i cheated on her and broke up with her then 3 months after it not working in my new relationship i decide to get back with her, shes totally over the moon that i took her back but then i was again stupid and kissed a girl at a party i know what i did was wrong but i got my act together and started treating her right i think we broke up because the trust factor in our relationship went causing her to not love me as much she broke up with me?? this was a shock i begged for her back which is so so wrong but she came back but then ended it again after a month then we got back together once more and it only lasted 3 weeks i was so clingy when we got back together i was always telling her how amazing and gorgeous she was she and i were planning on having a life together! from a young age at 18 this means alot really but the main thing is now were talking again she wants me to change into a good person again because i have a weed problem i smoke too much of it which causes my childish outbursts and anger issues which makes me look stupid, overall i really want her back ive not acted desperate ive only talked about day to day things with her nothing romantic just plain casual saw her this evening and it was great we couldnt stop talking her dad wanted her to go back inside but she wanted to stay out a bit longer but i feel like there is still something she even admitted to me a week before today that she still loves me but sometimes she doesent admit it well most of the time im keeping it cool now i met her today should i try meeting up with her again or what?? i dont want her rejecting me again and me looking like a complete tool u get me? im worried about goin to jail and her getting with someone else and im obviously not able to get her back if im sitting inside a prison cell for months i just need some good solid advice im a right mess atm and need her back but i need a good solid plan first

The whole point of No Contact is to avoid conversations with her, general or relationship wise until you feel more sorted out emotionally to deal with things rationally. The only conversations that is encouraged is if it’s a serious issue (financial matters, divorce paperwork, children, etc). You should tell her that you would like some space since the relationship has ended to work on yourself.

Also, this is slightly different than I thought I should do it. Based on what I should text him after the 30 day + few more for divorce date to go by mark, (based on your article) I have actually composed a message. The flow of the message is as follows:

Determine specifically what each of you needs and wants from the relationship. Ask, “What do you feel like you weren’t getting before?” and “What can we do to help you get that from the relationship?” Similarly, tell her what it is you need–without being accusatory–and figure out how the two of you can help you get that.

For instance, in the future when he was traveling for business and staying alone in hotels he would plan ahead what to do in the evenings: phone his wife, work on his computer, read, watch his favorite TV shows.  He would NOT go to the hotel bar. If he met people in the lobby, if the acquaintances were women he would speak with them briefly and then say goodbye.  He would go out to dinner only with men friends.  If women joined them, he would not engage in one-on-one conversations with them. Alcohol, private time with women plus loneliness and a disconnected relationship with his wife had been a dangerous combination for him. 

Since you work together, it would be good to show him how well you’re doing and how happy you are whenever he sees you. This is similar to displaying it on social media during the no contact period of the changes you’ve made to yourself except in real life.

If you look at your current situation then it is your ex girlfriend that care least and holding all cards. It is you that who keeps on searching how to get your ex girl back. If you want to control your relationship then you have to care least. Accept it and work on techniques (I will mention later) to reverse it.

I need help! My boyfriend and I just broke up 4 days ago and we were together for 4 months but I’ve known him since we were in 6th grade (I’m a freshman now) and since then, he has liked me. So, a month ago I found out that he liked my best friend and I broke up with him. A week later, we started dating again. The problem is that I’m bipolar and I get jealous really easy, especially when he’s around the girls that he use to like. When we started dating again, we decided to be honest to each other no matter how bad it was and I did my job, from the beginning of our relationship, I told him I still had little feelings for my ex but it didn’t matter because he goes to another school. We promised each other that I wasn’t going to text my ex anymore and he wasn’t going to talk to my friend or even get near her. 4 days ago, my best friend and other 2 girls were in a group and I guess he was waiting for his friend but I didn’t care, I wanted him away from her. I told him to move and he kept saying he was waiting for his friend. I started counting till 5 and I turned around and left. He followed me but I ignored him. I knew that if I talked to him, I was going to break up with him and I didn’t want that, so I left. I texted him 30 minutes later explaining why I was mad and why I ignored him, I even apologized and all I got was “…. I dunno…” At that moment, I knew it was over. I begged him not to break up but he wouldn’t take me back. The next day I talked to him, I had to. I told him that… I might be pregnant. I told my mom and she was not okay, I lost all her trust. He also told his mom and she said if I was pregnant, she was going to support him but since I’m not, she doesn’t want us back together. I know he still loves me but I don’t know what to do anymore. Today I found out that he started talking to his ex, so I did the same. This is really affecting me. I did not go to one of my classes today because he has the same class, I also left school early because I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I feel like this is slowly killing me. I feel like I need him! :'( Can someone help me?