Shoot for about 10 minutes and then end the conversation with him. The goal is to be upbeat, positive, and give the impression that you’re fine, everything in your life is good, and you’re feeling happy. Showing bitterness or resentment is only going to drive him further away from you.

The most effective way to get him to come out and see you is by calling him. You can suggest meeting up for coffee or a drink, with the mindset that they’re a friend you want to meet up with, not an ex-boyfriend you want to get back.

Let him date the other woman. It doesn’t matter. You can still approach him as a friend and start spending time with him. If you don’t contact him for a while and then message him, then he will start talking to you again as mentioned in the 5 step plan.

Everyone knows that reverse psychology essentially involves trying to get someone to do something by suggesting they do the opposite. For example, if I was to ask you to stop reading this article right now and not another sentence …what would you do?

One of the make or break point will be your ability to handle your emotions. It will be even more of a roller coaster than you anticipate because the thought of knowing that the one you love is in someone else’s arms can drive you crazy.

Researchers at the University of Texas conducted a survey of 274 college-aged participants who had experienced an on-again, off-again relationship and found that most people predominantly got back together with an ex because of lingering feelings. Just make sure you aren’t mistaking those “lingering feelings” for loneliness or fears of the single life. “People break up for a reason,” says Joanne Davila, PhD, psychology professor and director of clinical training at Stony Brook University in New York and author of The Thinking Girl’s Guide to the Right Guy. “If [your reason to go back] reflects a sense of low self-worth, lack of confidence, or insecurity, that’s not a good reason to go back to an ex.”

You might expect that there was a fee for American Dating Society to learn Jane’s four step method. And there was. After all, it’s not uncommon for relationship professionals to charge upwards for $150 per hour!

I assume it opened with “Mary, I’m an idiot…” She now says it was tear-stained. Regardless, it worked. She texted me to say she had gotten the letter, which led to hanging out as friends, which led to drinking as friends and eventually a relationship.

Since you’re with the same person, it can be easy to strike up the same relationship — and that’s exactly what you’ve worked on not doing. “Give yourself space and time to get clear before you rush back in and fall into old patterns,” says Shield.

            Men, if your wife has left you, she has felt hurt for a long time. It is likely that she sought to communicate her feelings, but you interpreted the passion of her words as whiny complaints or attacks. You responded not with understanding or compassion, but with defensiveness and correction as you warded off the verbal rocks she was throwing. This left her feeling alone, unheard, and unvalued.

For the first 2 years plus in our relationship, empty/unfulfilled promises from me, misbehaving, overspending, lack of proper planning, spending too much time/money on games and infidelity caused our first 2 breakups.

After breakup you want your ex girlfriend in your life but instead of pushing her away, you are actually pulling her. By pulling your ex girlfriend you are actually putting more pressure on her. She will start thinking she can get you anytime but she will never want you.