Hi, my boyfriend of almost 1 year broke up with me just a week ago. It was very hard for both of us, as I love him with all my heart and he seemed genuinely upset about it too. we didn’t have a fight or anything, he just said he thinks i love him more than he loves me and isn’t sure if this is what he wants. when we left the place where we broke up, we were both very sad. yesterday i bumped into him, and he was very nice to me, we even chatted for a while about our school work. he just seemed very casual, relaxed and happy to see me. i plan on not contacting him for a while, but is this relationship already a lost cause if he seems all casual and treating me as a friend only a week after he left me? does this show that he actually never really cared enough about me?

Notice how I didn’t specify if this friend was a male or female. You just planted a seed of doubt in your ex boyfriends head and now he is going to wonder if you saw a romantic movie with a friend or with a date.

To humility and self-awareness I would add skills. That’s why I wrote my book Power of Two and the website poweroftwomarriage.com. I’d sure love to see more folks access the gratifications of a fully loving committed relationship….

..I Kno Dat We Stl Have Feelings 4 Each Other Bt We R No More As Before.He Contect Me N Tl Dat He Have Got A New Gf Bt our relation memories of 3years have fill his mind ful dat he stl think of me..our relation was not bout?bt the caring 4 each other..dat tears n mainly dat trust i put on him..i relly love my ex..bebz..

Since trying to get your ex back takes time and going through the no contact period is an everyday struggle, I’ve designed Part 5 of this guide to be an email series. I call this email series EBP Basics.

More often than not if you have gotten this far in your conquest to get them back they are going to respond back positively. Except this time you are going to engage them in a conversation but make sure that you don’t go too fast. Remember, you still have to be the one to end the conversation first. Lets look at how a conversation like this might play out using an example from above:

My ex made me do things am not suposed to do because i could not stand is new behaviour and act towards me anymore and we lost trust for each other dor i still love him but i was the one who decide the breakup cos i had enough of it already nw he is far from me we don’t usually see on the road is there a chance of getting him back and making him beg me to come back

He broke up with me over a month ago and i am still upset. I know he is not seeing anyone else and he knows i’m not either. When we broke up he told me he wants to be happy (he’s very depressed). He told me that he loves me way more than i love him and it’s just difficult to deal with that because i think that 2 people who love each other should be with together. we have been texting and it’s either very short or very long and we also have our location on for each other. we were together for almost 15 months and i see a future with him and he is fully aware that i would do anything to have him back. i want to see him so badly but i don’t think he wants to see me. He’s going through a lot of stuff like depression and he gets lost in his thoughts and this caused him to think i was cheating or lying to him or that i didn’t love him. I think cheating is disgusting and i’d never lie to him. He also can’t get over certain things…. such as him not being my first sexual partner which bothers me because i am a year older than him and it just bothers me that he doesn’t understand. all i want is for him to be happy but i also want him to be happy with me and i am so stuck. i asked him if he would ever come back and he said he doesn’t know. everyone keeps telling me to focus on myself and i can’t because i’m only focused on him and i really have hopes that we will get back together.

We broke up just a few days ago. The guy is younger and has no experience on relationships nor has he kissed someone before him… Before we broke up he said he wanted the same “magic” we had on the beggining… Should I cool for a month before trying something with him again, like even just a friendship

That’s good Emily, initiate No Contact first and give both parties some space to let go of any negative emotions or thoughts. He may very well be serious about the possibility of working out, but that’s definitely not something that can be achieved right now.

I have a friend (who wants to remain unnamed.) He ended up breaking up with his girlfriend of 5 months for some silly reason (I honestly never understood it.) Anyways, three months after their breakup she started dating a new guy. Immediately my friend called me up and wanted her back. He didn’t realize what he had until he saw her with another guy.

I am afraid he completely lost his faith in it which is not a wonder if I think about it. Even I am happier without that relationship because that was a constant fight between my heart and mind. What I would like to do: start a completely new thing with him because I think we might match naturally, only I protected myself against love all along. But I am aware that human beings are not guniea pigs so it might be late. I just wanna get the highest chance to start it again if possible at all. I hurt him so many times and we had 3 breakups during 3 months. So it is almost hopeless to base a new start on good memories.

Any ideas about how to initiate this kind of conversation with him, start talking in a more positive light? Over text or in person? I just want to open the lines to him without him feeling that giving me any positive encouragement = he wants me again right now.

And then he jumped into another relationship 6 days later after we broke up. But I didn’t know until I changed my mind gave up the work oppotunity and back from oversea. I was pretty upset and stop talking to him. Nearly two months later, he messaged me asked me how have I been and we had a short personal conversation. And then he contacted me pretty much every month while he still in the new relationship. I stalked his instagram and noticed he broke up with his new girlfriend at the beginning of September but I didn’t react to it.Two weeks later, his band annouced they have a gig soon. I wanted to go but I couldn’t decide go or not. A few days later he messaged me again , we had a short conversation and I asked him can I go to the gig or not. he said yes. Two days before the gig he messaged me said he could send me home after the gig although it was late but I rejected. I end up stayed at his house. I have feelings for him again so I messaged him for hungout again two weeks later and we spend the whole weekend together.

I have sustained a period of 30 days and now looking at trying again. I have identified several areas where i have needed to change and continued to develop. Some of these no doubt contributed to the split.

Yes, you pushed him, but on the other hand, he used you! Let’s make things clear for a second, I am a guy and he is too, we get sexually frustrated and we don’t know what’s taking us, so we may say things and do things we don’t really mean, a word of advice, leave him be, don’t call hi, don’t text him and if he’s going to attend a social gathering, then, don’t go!

I absolutely connect with a lot of what you said in the article about working through your feelings and trying to actually make positive changes that will help you in the long run, no matter what happens.

There’s a likelihood that he may be affected by the break up as much as you, but won’t show it because he doesn’t want you to see him as being weak. If you said that the break up was just as difficult for him as it was for you, then he probably hasn’t moved on completely nor has he lost feelings for you. Also, the reason he gave you seems to come from a lack of self-esteem, and can’t accept the fact that he’s less into you than the other way around. Perhaps you could start off as being friends and letting him develop the feelings or take charge this time.

For years Peter had reacted to Paulette’s complaints about him with defensiveness. When he did allow himself to hear information about what he was doing that troubled his wife, he’d get mad at himself.  Listening to her had escalated his agitation and distress instead of leading to learning. Now Peter decided he’d better address her concerns, beginning by writing out a list of all he could recall. “Information is power,” he reminded himself to ease the sting of shame and guilt. 

This is another legitimate reason for a breakup. Unfortunately, in my personal opinion it says more about of his lack of character (unless you were really boring but I doubt that) than anything you actually did. Luckily, seeming boring is quite easy to fix!

my boyfriend broke up with me about a week ago. although it was a break up, he also said he just wants time and space to think about things and he would consider getting back together if major things changed, but he’s not sure if that’s possible. we had a really great relationship full of respect and trust, we just started to argue more and more and i think we need some time apart for him to realize the problems can be fixed and are not worth throwing out an amazing relationship over. we’re both in college and on winter break, so i’m planning on reaching out when we both get back. i’m in the middle of no contact, but should i text him on christmas or new years? does this sound like a relationship that can be fixed?

Well, since January would have been some time since your last contact with her, you could always drop her a casual text to ask her how her New Year has been and see how she responds from there. If she doesn’t respond positively, it might really do you justice and a big favor to walk away from this, and focus on moving on.

I believe very strongly that outside influences have some bearing on the breakups. For example money problems, problems at work , health problems, etc. I believe these contribute to the breakdown of the relationship. If we don’t deliberately pay attention and put your loved one first. Then your are heading down a real steep hill and soon you will fall off the cliff.

To be honest, I think it’s actually a good time to send him the email, as it creates a bigger impact (birthday, Christmas and the start of his holiday). If you want him back, you could send the email then and definitely include the birthday and Christmas wishes as well.

While trying to sort things out in my life currently and can’t help thinking of her and i came upon this page. And sadly i had committed all 5 deadly mistakes, I don’t know how i can help myself so maybe ill just share my story

If you scored one or two points, you might be noticing a couple of things in your relationship that are unhealthy, but it doesn’t necessarily mean they are warning signs. It’s still a good idea to keep an eye out and make sure there isn’t an unhealthy pattern developing. The best thing to do is to talk to your partner and let them know what you like and don’t like. Encourage them to do the same. Remember, communication is always important when building a healthy relationship. It’s also good to be informed so you can recognize the different types of abuse.

The quiz is based on relationship science, using a series of questions to identify various factors that have been proven to influence the likelihood of getting back together with an ex. A mathematical algorithm analyzes your answers and calculates your odds of repairing your relationship.

Would you like to know whether he is over his ex-wife or not? Well, let me present you with the following quiz, it will help you tremendously know what he is thinking about and whether he still has feelings for his ex-wife or not.

Chances are that you are here because you are still very much in love with your ex boyfriend. If this is the case you will likely be wondering how to make him want you back. When you listen to your friend at this time they will be telling you to get over him and move on with your life. This is a lot easier said than done and not the advice that you want to hear right now. If you really do believe that he is the right person for you, then you will have to do some work and not be dissuaded by well meaning friends. If you are determined that this is what you want to do, you will have to have a good plan. With the help of the experts, you will learn how to make him want you back again and even make his love for you stronger than it was before. You have to be proactive though, so let’s get started.

My ex and I have been talking ever so slightly lately but nothing substantial. About a month ago I asked her in person if she was mad at me and she said yes bc of stuff I said to another person. She didn’t tell me what I said or who I said it to. Honestly I have no clue. She added how she thought it was funny how I said that we would get back together one day(she dumped me) but that I closed the door on us even being friends. She’s only 23 and I’m the only person she dated. I’m having a hard time getting her to talk to me about it. A bit afraid to ask her in person bc she’s always surrounded with her friends at work and don’t feel it’s appropriate to show up at her home. She won’t reply to a text that involves talking about why she’s upset. What do I do? What are my options here?

He does not seem emotionally capable of dealing with serious issues and would rather avoid it altogether, hence why he leaves you in a state of limbo because he himself doesn’t want to deal with it. Sometimes in this case, it would be better for you to make the choice and stick with it because he may never do it on your behalf.

4. Do some meditation. Be aware of yourself. Know your weaknesses and strengths. Be proud of yourself. Accept yourself for who you are. That’s what confidence is all about. Neediness (which is very unattractive) comes from doubts within yourself. Whereas confidence comes from awareness and accepting yourself.

Hi ryan..thanks for your reply..i will try to give her that space and time like you said..but i really need your advice on how to win her trust back and confidence and keep our love..what so i really do during this break?