It’s ok to be friendly again with her friends but it looks like you’re obvious to her that you’re trying to get her back and she doesnt want it… Asking her friends for help will annoy her more.. Dont rush thingss..
Casually hang out with your ex. Do something non-committal like have a drink with friends or play miniature golf, including him or her with others. Make it something friends and first dates alike can do. And whatever it is, keep it fun and skip out on the serious talks for now.
My boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago kind of out of the blue. We’ve been slowly declining for a while, and I would bring up the fact that I felt like things weren’t going good all the time, but he always ignored my pleas for better communication. It finally came to a head and I broke up with him, and then quickly took it back the next day and we decided to get back together. Things seemed to be going really well and then he broke up with me, also saying he needs time and space. During these 2 weeks I’ve come to realize that a lot of the problems were me. I was so emotionally dependent on him, and I would turn negative if I couldn’t be with him. He was my source of happiness and I didn’t realize that until that was gone. I’ve been working on recognizing my problems and fixing them, because in the end I want him back. I really believe that now that I know what the problems were that he never told me during the relationship, if we were to try again, it would be really successful. I broke no contact a few times and was regrettably desperate in asking for him to come back and work on things, to which he kept saying he needs time and space and he’s taking that for himself. I don’t know if I should wait for him to reach out since I’ve reached out so many times (but will not anymore!!) But I’m afraid he won’t and will just move on without me. The fact that he said he needs time and space makes me believe like he wants to revisit the idea of us getting back together, but that may just be me overthinking it. I just want him to see all the progressive I have been making so he can realize even though I may have lost my way and gotten too attached, my intentions were always pure and my love was always real. How do I get him back?
However, it is not advisable to change who you are totally just to win her back. What you have to do, instead, is just to present the best version of yourself. She was attracted to you before so have faith that you can do it again by exerting an effort to improve your physical appearance.
My situation feels different to these options. It’s been about a month now since my ex decided to end the relationship. She has all her friends and family in her ear telling her it was a good thing and simply keeping her and I away from eachother. She says she’s happier this way but I’m really quite the opposite. I’ve spent a lot of nights crying and even spent two nights in hospital after attempted suicide. Since the breakup we’ve kept in contact and one night we even had a little fling and had sex. Almost immediately afterwards she told me it meant nothing to her and it was just sex. She has been getting real close with one of her friends and they’ve kissed and rugged eachother a little. I’ve made the mistake of begging several times. I’ve done all I could think to get her back but after doing my research I’ve realised I’ve only been “emotionally blackmailing” her. I’m pretty much at the point where I’d even kill to get her back. I’ve seen a lot of guides and programs but I simply don’t have money to pay for them. I was really hoping that maybe you could shoot me an email and work put a way to help me get my ex back.
One inspiring, helpful , insightful and motivating email everyday. I have helped thousands of people (somewhere around 50,000) with these emails. The reason why these everyday emails are so effective is because you get a small dose of inspiration, motivation and useful information every day.The no contact period is the most important part of the plan and with Part 5, you will get support during the no contact period.
I again want to mention it is important to act happy, cheerful and calm when talking with your ex-girlfriend. Let the conversation unfold and allow her to lead the conversation. If she is bringing the relationship into the conversation, then it is fine to enter in the line of discussion but make sure you are not the one who is bringing it up.
Denver clinical psychologist Susan Heitler, Ph.D, a graduate of Harvard and NYU, is author of Power of Two, a book, a workbook, and a website that teach the communication skills that save and sustain positive relationships.
Think about anything you spend your time on now that your ex would have scorned, laughed at, or not understood. You won’t be hiding that part of yourself from the next girl who comes along – and she’ll like you more for your forthrightness and unselfconscious attitude.
“I’m now in a relationship with a girl I’m absolutely crazy about. I’ve used the advice you gave in regards to the rules of attraction… and everything you said was absolutely correct. I couldn’t be happier at the moment, and I owe it to you. Thank you. Keep up the wonderful work… I’m sure you’re going to help a lot of people.”
Because the more recent your breakup, the higher your chances of getting her back. That means that you’re staring at a big window of opportunity that is closing one second at a time. If you fail to act on this now and continue to sit there waiting for a miracle to happen on its own, you could end up losing her forever.
2nd Step: Now delete her from all messaging service such as WhatsApp, Viber etc. The only exception is don’t delete her from your Facebook but don’t view her profile. You can also temporary shutdown notification from her in your Facebook profile.
If you ask me what is the #1 attraction killer in the relationship then I would say it is INSECURITY. Yes! It is insecurity that make your girlfriend to leave you. You certainly showed insecurity that kills all attraction in the relationship.
You didn’t satisfy her in the bedroom – Yep. You suck in the bedroom. Why do I know this? Because even if you were boring as a person, she would still stick around for a while longer or talk to you about things if you were AMAZING in the sack.
“She wouldn’t even kill me. She just left. She didn’t even care enough to cut off my head or set me on fire. I mean, is that too much to ask? You know, some little sign that she cared? It was that truce with Buffy that did it. Dru said I’d gone soft. Wasn’t demon enough for the likes of her. And I told her it didn’t mean anything I was thinking of her the whole time, but she didn’t care. So, we got to Brazil and she was… she was just different. I gave her everything. Beautiful jewels, beautiful dresses with beautiful girls in them, but nothing made her happy. And she would flirt. I caught her on a park bench making out with a Chaos Demon. Have you ever seen a Chaos Demon? They’re all slime and antlers; they’re disgusting. She only did it to hurt me. So I said, “I’m not putting up with this anymore.” And she said, “Fine.” And I said, “Yeah, I’ve got an unlife, you know.” And then she said… she said we could still be friends. God, I’m so unhappy.”
However, don’t go overboard in pushing them. Like ”Come on. Just go out with me once. Please. Pretty please.” Or “You broke up with me and broke my heart. The least you can do is go out with me one time.”
If your ex has fallen into the friend zone (for example, if he or she says “I’m no longer in love with you”), you might be able to recreate the experience of falling in love by building intimacy with your ex. In one study, a researcher had two strangers stare into each other’s eyes and then answer personal questions (like “What is your biggest fear?” and “What is your best memory from childhood?”). They were able to create an intimate bond between the strangers, creating attraction and even the feelings of love. Try spending time looking into your ex’s eyes and asking deep questions and see if this helps move your relationship back into intimate territory.
A first out-of-bounds behavior is one thing. If the mistake is corrected and not repeated ever again that is a positive development and can result in continuation of a better-than-ever marriage. Continued deal-breaker behaviors however, I agree, are invitations to divorce.
Damn I’m so sorry.. me a different story. I thought it was going well but suddenly she told me that she wanted to be honest and saying she didn’t wanted anyone and then she told me shitty things to cover it up.. fuck that bitch..man we don’t need them.. they are just fucking heartbreakers
Well I tried adding her back on Facebook about 6 days ago and she hasn’t accepted. She told a mutual friend that she doesn’t want to accept and doesn’t want me to think that there’s still something there between us. Also she said that she was done with the relarionship but kept changing her reasons to the mutual friend. She has also deleted a lot of “couple photos” of us and has changed the description from “my man and my baby” to just nothing. It seems as though she’s trying to erase me out of her life. She also told this mutual friend that she can’t remember the last time I made her smile or laugh, which is a lie. I made an instagram post, she still follows me on there, and has seen a couple funny/silly videos i posted up on there but hasn’t “liked” any. Not sure if she did that on purpose or is genuinely not wanting me back at all. She seems quite set in her decision. Our mutual told me that she might be suffering from a mild form of depression due to hating her job so much. and she mentioned the girl I was talking to (the reason for our 1st breakup 4 years ago) and was angry about it. Seems like she’s still jealous about something that happened 4 years ago. Our mutual friend told her that a healthy amount of jealousy is a good thing and that she must love me if she’s mentioning that and is jealous about it. Our mutual friend believes that she doesn’t know what she wants. She went from quite an abusive relationship where she was emotionally and mentally abused and used up, and then she got me a guy that treats her like a princess.
Long story short, I met this girl and fell head over heels in love. We have been together four years. We moved in together almost two years ago. I asked her to marry me about two months later. During this time, I have stayed in contact with my ex-wife in just a friendly way, however, I kept this a secret from my fiancé. Well, she found out about six months ago and flipped out and asked me to move out. I did and begged her to take me back. After a few days or so, she agreed to start seeing me again. Now, about ten days ago, she broke up with me again and said it weighing on her mind all the time and she has thought about it and wants to break up. The difference was with the other breakup, she still texted me and said things like, “you just lost the best thing you’ll ever have”, etc. This time, I can barely get her to text me or anything. First few days she was very quiet, then she started ignoring me, then for two days she texted me like old times, then on Friday I wake up and she texts me that I am contacting her to much and she is unhappy about it. I say I won’t contact her anymore and I stopped. Well, Saturday night, she starts texting me asking me what I am doing, etc. This went on through Sunday, now here is Monday and she has gotten quiet again. I feel like I am dying. I did something stupid and nothing is working. She said, “No flowers, no cards, stop it.” Help please.
Realize that you know yourself better than ever before. You’ve looked into your own heart and sought to understand it. You’ve tallied your interests and goals, and made new friends without anyone there to affect your presence. In short, you know yourself now in a way that you didn’t before. You’re more poised, more possessed, and more confident as a result.
However, before we hit the ground running I feel it is important to mention a few things. The game plan outlined above is not set in stone. Every single relationship is unique and may require unique steps that I haven’t outlined. Knowing what to do can sometimes depend on your gut. So, if your gut is telling you that a particular tactic I have outlined won’t work for you I would definitely trust it. The main takeaway here is that you are going to have to get creative and sometimes even skip entire skips depending on how fast you are moving.
I remember it like it was yesterday. My girlfriend and I had been together for almost 4 years and things were going great. Then one day she called me out of the blue, and blurted out four words that stopped me dead in my tracks….
You are exercising aren’t you? If you aren’t, then don’t expect this course to work. If you can’t forth the effort required to improve your immediate situation or to follow through on my suggestions one has to wonder just how serious you are about getting back your ex.
Yes! I know it is really difficult for you to stop all the contact ways with the one you love most but for the sake of getting your ex back you have to take this step and you can ignore it in any way. If you contact your ex without being in control of your emotions then most probably you will hurt your chances of getting them.
I was with my ex for 5 years. I broke up with him 6 months ago when I came to realize that I needed to work on my self confidence and he to work on his ability to show emotions. I applied NC without realizing it. He eventually reached out once per month in a friendly way, but nothing more than that.
So here’s my situation. I’ve had a relationship for the past 3.5 years. For a long time prior to those years she had a huge crush on me, but i never really did anything with it. Even still we got together. During the relationship i never really felt i was truly in love with her, at least i thought so. But i also need to mention that i was smoking weed on a daily basis. (She hated that) Which resulted in me not to be able to express my feelings in the right way, or even to be having’ feelings. During this time i was unemployed and living in her house pretty much rent-free, and even still she was the sweetest girl in the world for me. (make’s me sick to my stomach even thinking about that now) I was a really selfish guy over the years, never surprised her or anything like that and have been taking’ her for granted During the entire relationship. Never really considered her feelings. (Again, sick to my stomach) So due to text messages she started building a emotionally relationship with some guy she met a bar way back before our relationship. Can’t really blame her for that giving the fact i was emotionally unavailable due to smoking weed. It always stayed with text messaging she claims and i believe her. This lasted from May to August. I forgave her. Last September we’ve been on holiday together, for here it was a sort of last attempt to save our relationship. Which i didn’t knew at the time. So i continued in my own selfish ways, and continued smoking weed. She was slipping right from under my nose and i didn’t even noticed. After the holiday we’ve stayed together until November 10th which is when she dumped me. Again, cant blame her, thinking back i am surprised she even last this long with me. Since then i have stopped smoking weed, cant even stand the smell of it, got a job, and starting to express my emotions again. Needless to say that i want her back, in fact i feel like im in love with her. She says its to late, that she really would want it but that her feelings for me has changed. However, she does keep contacting me, even send some nudes and stuff like that but still don’t want te be in a relationship anymore. Also does she really badly wants to stay friends and gets really upset if i suggest to brake contact, just because i cant handle this form of contact we are having right now, simply because i want her back so badly. Do think NC will do the trick? I’ve been trying it 2 times already but never got past 2/3 days as she keeps calling/texting me and i feel bad for her and cave. And its hard for me as well of course. Sorry for my English, im from Europe.
However, make it a point to do this intimate talk in person. Avoid doing it over the phone, through text or online chat. What you should do, instead, is to invite her to have dinner with you. If possible, do it in your favorite restaurant or coffee shop to increase your chances of rekindling the feelings.
Kevin, we broke up 8 days ago. Since then, I have messaged him everyday constantly and he barely replies. I have to text him a hundred times before he replies just once. I really love him and want to be with him, but I don’t understand why he is acting like this. He said he loved me and then suddenly this.