If things felt awful, strained, and tense at the end of your relationship (which is very normal), then making sure your vibe is good is the best thing you can do. That way, he’ll be shocked at the difference in how it feels to be around you.

My ex broke up with me after 2.5 years with a message, however he never actually let go of me until last few days he told me he slept with someone and this someone is pregnant. He still has my dog and must keep it until December because of practical issues I can’t take the dog with me yet as her documents are missing. We still talk like normal people and he still tells me I’m the love of his life and the happiness and love he felt for me he never felt before, and when he says those things I feel better but than I think how he got someone pregnant after we were still talking to eachother, and he was still telling me he wants to try to make this relationship work?after all this time together and all the efforts I did. I get crazy. I have lost around 5/6 kg as I cannot eat and stop thinking because I’m afraid of my reaction of when I see a picture of him with someone else or their baby and I know he is not happy with her at least not now…but how to get over all this?how to stop thinking about him and this stupid thing he did? Our lives where very different and maybe if we would have stayed together we would have broken up or ended up getting a divorce, that’s the main reason that he broke up, our different cultures, backgrounds and future. So he just found someone who can accept that he is poor, works crazy hours for little money, has never money, before married and not yet divorced and with 3 children, but I was always trying to improve him to make him get the divorce, to find a better job and I thought him how to save money and many other things. But I think how can a man do this to someone he wanted to marry and have a future. And how a woman can keep the baby of someone she just met?i just want to be happy again and take my dog and wish that he will get what he deserves and realizes of what he has lost

My ex and I have been together for 6 months and he broke up with me last Saturday over the phone. We were each other’s first loves. We’ve had the ‘Honeymoon’ phase but from around 2 months into the relationship up until our recent breakup, we’ve been having arguments based on jealousy, mistrust and miscommunications. We would make up the day after the argument and be good then have another argument a few days later. Most of the arguments were started by me due to my overthinking, insecurities and accusations. We broke up once in September over some trust issues and an argument, but got back together after a week. He said he needed time off to forget the pain and it was him who apologised asked me back. Anyway, this time we’ve had constant arguments for a week straight before the breakup, he said the mistrust and me always starting shit was too much for him and that he’s lost the attraction for me. I haven’t been needy after the breakup and haven’t done any of the 5 things to avoid. I have took time to reflect on my behaviours and realised my mistakes. I really wish we could start again. I’ve only texted him 2 days after the breakup, saying “hey” and asking him how he is. He responded rather quick and said he’s “decent”. I haven’t texted him back ever since and neither did he. Should I start the NC period now? And for how long should it last? Is there anything else I can do to contribute towards getting back together?

3. One last thing before asking him out: Figure out whether he’s single. If he doesn’t list his relationship status online, check out his Facebook photos to see whether the same girl reappears in various cozy poses with him. Or you can subtly feel him out by asking, in a Facebook message or e-mail, about old friends you both had, and then segue into a conversation about his personal life in general. Hopefully his love sitch will come up.

Act like you’re fine. One key way to make your ex jealous is to not let on that you are upset. Even if you are heartbroken, pretend that you are good. Don’t talk about the breakup, and don’t let your ex see your sad. Make your ex think that you don’t care that the relationship has ended.

Once you’re set and committed and know you want him back and that he truly deserves you back, and both of your lives are much more enriched because of the relationship, then there is nothing at all that should hold you back. You really, really, really can win him back no matter how bad things might seem.

So this is my story, I met a girl in college who is a couple years younger than me and throughout that year and the next we just had an unbelievable relationship. We would talk everyday and occasionally see each other on weekends. I knew she liked me through her friends and she knew I liked her, but we never were official boyfriend and girlfriend, but there were times when we both hinted at that outcome. I told her that I want her in my life and she wanted me to be in her life, but not in the same way. I texted her saying I couldn’t be just friends with her and that I’ll always have love for her because she was the first person I fell in love with in my life. 8 months ago I made a huge mistake and went over to her house back home unannounced and did it so no one would know I was there to drop off a handwritten letter after texting her; I went over to her house 3 times because the first two times I was afraid of what she would think if I did that when I hadn’t been over there before. This mistake backfired on me and she found out I had been stopping by her house a couple times before, and it creeped her out now she has blocked me on every social media accounts and I haven’t talked to her in 8 months. I’ve been thinking a lot about her like everyday morning, during, and at night before I go to sleep, and even dream about her. I know she isn’t my ex but in other peoples eyes she was definitely more than just a friend to me, and I want nothing more to have her back in my life, but I’m pretty sure she hates me and doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore. What should I do? I moved across country for work, but found out some family stuff is going on that I might have to move back home to where she and I both live, and I know that once I do I’ll be reminded of the fact that I lost the only girl I cared about and it is killing me inside. Asking for advise on what to do, and if there is anything I can do to make her trust me again and hopefully someday have her back in my life

Always keep in mind, an attractive women to a man is someone who knows how to balance being independent and shows his softer vulnerable so his boyfriend able to ‘protect’ her. Even if you don’t want to be protected by anyone then still you have to show some vulnerability to awaken your man’s natural protection ability. A man who protects you is a man who is deeply connected with you in a relationship.

Be positive. Negativity, sadness and depression are not productive when it comes to getting your boyfriend back. In fact, they’re likely to undermine any efforts you make; nothing is less attractive than self-pity. Instead, look for the silver linings everywhere you can. If he hasn’t found a new love interest, it means he’s still stuck on you. If he has moved on, it means he’s trying to forget you by desperately latching onto someone else. Either way, you can get your boyfriend back! Be positive, happy and energetic; these qualities are contagious.

3. Go out with friends. Spend time with your loved ones. Your friends and family are the people who are always there for you and who always love to spend time with you. Go out and have a good time with them.

My ex and I broke up four months ago after a two year relationship. I found out I was suffering from bipolar disorder and I guess lack of maturity for being four years younger than him and I could tell I was really starting to hurt him. We both agreed that we should break up so I could get better and so could he. I’ve talked to him maybe once a week ever since the breakup to check in on him, but he always says he resents me, though he still has some good memories about me and wants me to stop bothering him so he won’t lose those. I just found out yesterday that he has been dating someone for about six weeks and my heart fell to my stomach. I can’t help but wonder if he loves her or thinks she is better than me. I also wonder if, since I have to move to the same city that he lives in in a year, he would see me more grown up, stable, and successful and want me back. He says his girlfriend is dealing with her ex as well, so I wonder if their relationship would even last too long, both of them coming out of long term relationships.

What do you do when you find the love of your life and she says the same thing and its as perfect as perfect can be? What do you do when that perfect woman is broken and a part of her wont accept your love and simply says goodbye? What do you do when there are no fights just love and joy and months of bliss and amazing love making but her 20 year marriage ruins her ability to have it? What do you do when you change your life to be with this amazing woman because its the promise… Read more »

When you believe that you could lose something, you’ll instinctively shrink inside and it will take the wind out of your sails. That feeling does not feel good, and the source of it is how you’re thinking about your situation, it’s your perspective.

If you don’t want to leave anything to chance or risk another woman swiping him from under your nose while he’s still single, or if you just want to ramp things up to the next level, then I invite you to learn the three fastest ways to melt a man’s heart.

I call this part “The Instincts” because all these mistakes are a direct result of people following their instincts. Most of the advice in this 5 Step Plan is counter-intuitive, but it works. When you read it, you will understand why and it will all start to make sense. So let’s start by going over the deadly mistakes that you should avoid at any cost.

I’m a very optimistic and I reply to your message with hope that time does help because things change. What you thought was real changes.. I was so mad when I found this out because it’s so cynical and it really ruined my perception of everything but it has helped force me to move on. My ex was in a relationship with one of his former girlfriends 2 weeks after we broke up. At first I was sure it was textbook rebound because she was so available to him. Then, after a few days, I realized she wasn’t his consolation prize, she was his preference. It tore me apart. I questioned everything. Now I believed he loved me very much when he did and all of our decisions for breaking up are still true but he left out that he was breaking up with me so that he could date her because I was too hard, our relationship was too hard and the future was going to be too much change for him. I knew who she was. She would text him occasionally. I wasn’t threatened by her because we were so strong but we were doing 3hr long distance and he would have had to change his entire life for me. It’s so Hubbell (from Sex and the City, season 2 finale). She’s easy, simple, not complicated. Things just got too hard with me. I have responsibilities, a real job (engineer), a child, a mortgage, and passion for living a meaningful life. He fell out of love with me in the last month. I saw the signs. I felt the distance growing. I just thought it was the honeymoon phase ending and time for us to inject some new passion in the next month. I didn’t get a next month. She pulled him away from me. Once I was able to accept the new reality of why we ended, I am able to move on a lot quicker. He had no intentions of hurting me. He didn’t know he would fall out of love with me. He’s just doing what is best for him. That’s just the direction his life wants to take him. If he wants small town, simple, and boring then he’s not the man for me. I hate the idea of starting over. I hate the idea of having to be with someone other than him but he is not meant for me. Deep in my heart I know this but I still grieve the loss of love occasionally but it’s gotten much better and I can look forward a little more than before. It’s terrifying to think that anyone we give our heart to can just decide they don’t want it anymore. But in the end what can you really do? You shouldn’t change who you are, what you need, what your standards are, or how you act to keep love. All you can do is share your love and the right person won’t let it go. It never works until it finally does. Be the person you want to be every day of your life and someone will want to share it with you. 95% of the population gets married in their lifetime. 95%! My ex of 1 year of my life. Just a fraction of the whole journey.

I nevr had the same feelings for him at that time. Since the beginning we use to hang on the phone 24/7. If we are not on phone we are in the school meeting up. It was that crazy the attachment. I was his first love. And he found so much comfort with me. After a few months I started avoiding him and he went into depression because I have avoided him due to his persusive behavior to accept him as my bf. After 6 months from not talking to each other, I missed him and I contacted him and told him to not push me because I treasure the friendship. He agreed and a few months later, I felt that I love him and told him that I am ready to be his gf.

Note that you may overcome such feelings eventually. Your reason for wanting him back is because you genuinely love him and care for him. You should be able to see yourself having a bright future with him and committing to love him and stay with him no matter what.

What It Is: Getting rid of old reminders of your ex can seem heartbreaking—like if you throw away that shirt your ex left in your closet, you also risk throwing away all the good memories. But hoarding too many souvenirs can just keep you tied to the bad feelings you have, and trashing them tells you that it’s okay to start forgetting and forge ahead with your life.

I get nervous any time I talk to a really pretty girl. Yup, as talkative and conversational as I am there are times where I can be in front of a girl and freeze up because I have a fear of what this girl is thinking about me. Heck, I have even been too scared to talk to a girl who I have had a crush on. Now, most guys probably wouldn’t admit that to you but I want you to realize that everyone in this world is carrying fears around with them.

I am going through a hard time with a very you g boyfriend. 9 years younger. And i have been crying and texting him and the last i did was called him. He said he was busy playing game and hung up on me when i ask if he still wants us.

In ISS, I wrote a four-page letter explaining how he’d made me feel and asking for an apology. He cursed me out and told me I’d be better off… gone… and then threatened to tell the vice principal I was bothering him. I felt really picked on and cried a lot and begged my mom to let me switch schools. She refused, because when I graduate I’ll be getting an Associate’s degree in Veterinary Assisting.

If you disciplined your mind and only focused on the love between the two of you, everything would have been perfect. What I’m trying to say is that because you were not careful of your thoughts and entertained doubts and fears about your relationship, you are where you are now.

So take his number out of your phone, resist the urge to e-mail him and stay away from the places where you know a run-in might otherwise be possible. It isn’t easy, but it is necessary if you want to know how to get your boyfriend back after a break up.

5. Go out on a date. This is absolutely essential and if you are reading this, then I will recommend that you definitely go out on a few dates before ending no contact with your ex. It’s absolutely imperative for you to get some perspective right now and meeting new people is the best way to do it.

It sounds like a man only wants a woman who never feels anything other than shiny happy perfect. She can never be anxious, worried, upset, hurt, pessimistic, negative, angry etc because it’s simply too much for a guy to deal with. A robot lady with no soul will do just fine. Great advice guys.

Create boundaries at home and limit the time spent there while she is around. Perhaps go out more, and even if you are at home, sleep in different rooms and engage in as little small talk as possible. You could use this article to provide you with more tips on what you can do while she’s still around.

WOW I don’t “KNOW” you…But I really like you! ?You are HILARIOUS and REAL and it’s clear that you’ve truly been “there” before by the things that you say. It’s like your taking these feelings and thoughts straight from MY mind and typing them out. I LOVE what you stand for (and what you don’t stand for). Well my question is in the last paragraph from what’s above, when you say something like : after getting your ex back he will eventually SHOW you (if we took your advice about showing we’re not putting up with the bs) that the break-up was a good thing.- Are you saying you feel they’ll still be the same way they were BEFORE the breakup (a f*cktard?) or they will possibly have changed for the better due to us setting those “what’s not acceptable” boundaries? And do you always feel that they would ONLY want you back due to a wanting to be in control thing not ever because they actually love you? Just wondering

So my question is this. He is going to be living 3 hours from me and I won’t be in contact with with anyone that he talks to and I have been advised of doing the no contact rule. I’m not sure of how I feel about the no contact rule because regardless of our relationship status, I care very deeply about him and I have for the 15 years I have known him and vice versa. I can’t imagine not being there for him during such a hard time in his life. We are both the type of people who are not into mind games and are honest no matter what and act honestly. Anyways, if no contact is something you also advise,then it’s worth a shot. But with him and me, we are what we are no matter the status or title. Ok now for my question, if I am not talking to him, how is he going to find out Im on the market? Do I tell him myself because there is no other way he would know. I highly doubt if I am casually dating someone, their picture is going to end up on my facebook lol. What do you think?

We never stopped talking, we always stayed friends and our chemistry has always been so strong. I ended up breaking off my engagement and we continued to see each other. We were not exclusive per se but it would have been the case if I had not started seeing my ex fiancé again. My (on and off boyfriend) found out and completely cut me off. We have never went more than 2 weeks of not speaking (even while I was engaged) anyway- he stopped talking to me for 5 months. I would reach out and he’d never respond up until about a month ago I asked him how he was and he finally responded that he was well and then never responded when I told him how I was since he proceeded to ask how I was. I left him alone for a couple of weeks and started to accept It wasn’t going back to how it used to. He always came back.

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You probably already know who I am, but for any new viewers out there, my name is Amy North… I’m a women’s dating coach from Canada, and I’m the owner of CoachNorth.com, my popular ladies-only website featuring free relationship guidance videos.

That’s it folks. That’s my advice. If I was able to get over my ex, I am sure that you will too. Even though it feels like it, it is not the end of the world. There is still someone out there waiting for you who will find you no matter what.

If your boyfriend was physically, emotionally, or verbally abusive in any way, you should not try to get back together with him. It’s perfectly normal for you to miss him even if it was an unhealthy relationship, but it’s important to remind yourself that you can do better.