Nobody is perfect.  You’re never going to like (or even love) everything about a person, but you should be able to accept their faults. “Being a part of a healthy relationship is to be able to be accepting of one’s partner,” says Dr. Davila. “If you can’t, then you should not get back together.” Pick your battles and figure out what flaws you’ll grow to accept in your ex. If every little thing they say and do still gets under your skin, then move on. 

You may have put all of your energy into your career or simply be overwhelmed by work; you could also have spent too much time with friends or focused most of your energy and time in a hobby or passion. Whatever the case may be you clearly did not give your ex the attention and care that they needed and deserved.

Most of the time, your friends are generally going to encourage you to stay away from an ex in an attempt to help you. And while they’re not always right, sometimes they are. If your friends beg you not to give him a second chance, ask why. They might be seeing something you’re not. If you bring up the thought and they don’t seem completely against it, that’s a good sign that they think this could be right for you. Sometimes it helps to get an outside perspective (although what you want is ultimately more important).

Read the signs. If your ex wants to get back with you, you’ll know. How did you know that he wanted you the first time? It’s likely that he’ll be sending similar signals your way. If he flirts with you, tells you that you look nice, lightly touches you, or just always asks what you’re up to or if you’re seeing anyone else, then yeah, he probably wants you back.

No woman who invests years of her life into a marriage will casually throw it away. For a woman to abandon her marriage she has to be in a state of extreme desperation. Tragically, most guys who attempt to reconcile do not understand the depth of pain it took to drive their wives to forsake their marriage. Consequently, they try to reconcile by offering apologies or writing letters that are mostly about them. If a devastated woman is going to open her heart back up to the husband who continually stepped on it, she needs to know that he sees the damage he did, feels for her in her painful, broken condition, and will therefore make great strides to avoid stepping on her heart again.  

Thank you for your share. I know how difficult it can be when trying to get back with an ex after years apart. You mentioned school. How old are the two of you? I would continue with the distance, as it’ll show her what she’s losing. We as humans have a tendency to really want things once they’re taken away from us. I know it’s hard, but it can make all the difference.

If you are just reading this article a few days after your breakup, it might be a bit too much for you to think all this through right now. So, you might want to bookmark this article and come back to it at a later stage when you have calmed down and can think rationally.

Did you completely cut out your social life? Do you no longer hang with your friends? Did you constantly find yourself being in demand of your ex’s time to do certain activities together as opposed to doing them alone? If you answered yes to any of the previous questions the odds are that you were in fact too needy.

If you and your ex are speaking to each other regularly. Text her the following or something similar. “Hey, I don’t want to come off as rude or anything, but I need some time and space to heal from the breakup and focus on myself. This is why I think I think we both shouldn’t speak to each other for a while. I hope you understand.”

If you focus your attention on spending time with your friends or pursuing a new hobby, you will have less time to miss your ex-boyfriend, which can help you avoid the pitfalls of getting back together just because you’re lonely.[16]

Thank you for sharing your story. It takes a lot of strength to be in your situation with such a level head. If you’re looking into getting back with your ex after years apart, the way in which you reach out will be critical. It would be non-threatening, and serve to establish a platform of future contact. I’d think you’d benefit from reading our “70 Pro Tips To Get Back With Your Ex”, but if you’ve like a more tailored approach given the uniqueness of your situation, please feel free to reach and we’ll book a session.

Clean up your smile- No, I don’t mean smile more even though you should do that. I am talking about literally looking at how you can get a better smile. If you have bad teeth then go to the dentist and see if you can get them cleaned.

So this is my story, I met a girl in college who is a couple years younger than me and throughout that year and the next we just had an unbelievable relationship. We would talk everyday and occasionally see each other on weekends. I knew she liked me through her friends and she knew I liked her, but we never were official boyfriend and girlfriend, but there were times when we both hinted at that outcome. I told her that I want her in my life and she wanted me to be in her life, but not in the same way. I texted her saying I couldn’t be just friends with her and that I’ll always have love for her because she was the first person I fell in love with in my life. 8 months ago I made a huge mistake and went over to her house back home unannounced and did it so no one would know I was there to drop off a handwritten letter after texting her; I went over to her house 3 times because the first two times I was afraid of what she would think if I did that when I hadn’t been over there before. This mistake backfired on me and she found out I had been stopping by her house a couple times before, and it creeped her out now she has blocked me on every social media accounts and I haven’t talked to her in 8 months. I’ve been thinking a lot about her like everyday morning, during, and at night before I go to sleep, and even dream about her. I know she isn’t my ex but in other peoples eyes she was definitely more than just a friend to me, and I want nothing more to have her back in my life, but I’m pretty sure she hates me and doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore. What should I do? I moved across country for work, but found out some family stuff is going on that I might have to move back home to where she and I both live, and I know that once I do I’ll be reminded of the fact that I lost the only girl I cared about and it is killing me inside. Asking for advise on what to do, and if there is anything I can do to make her trust me again and hopefully someday have her back in my life