Advice for the Broken Hearted Man
For the man asking me – “help me get my wife back”, I want you to know that I have some understanding of the deep pain you are in. Having your wife leave you is a gut wrenching experience, to be sure, for the man who still loves her.
At this point I won’t try to guess what went wrong or who is at fault, but let me offer you some advice. I cannot guarantee results (as much as I would like to) and it doesn’t work for everyone, but I’ve seen it work for a lot of people and to be honest, what do you have to lose?
Here are the three simple steps you should take if you want to get your wife back and resume a loving, enjoyable marriage:
If you’ve been calling her (or texting, or emailing) constantly, then stop right now. Call her just once and tell her you’re thinking of her and that you still care, but you need to leave it at that. Sometimes a woman can feel smothered and just want a little space. Give her that space and some time to figure out what she wants.
You can’t force her into loving you again, and the only way you really want her back is if she wants to be back; but if she’s got enough time to think the situation through she may come to that realization on her own. And that is best for both of you
Try to figure out what your shortcomings are and change them. It’s possible that you know what really bugs her about you – or maybe not. If this means finding a counselor you can go to then do it.
The point is that you and your estranged wife will only be miserable if you get back together without facing up to, and changing, the problems you had before. Does she have problems too? Of course, but you cannot worry about those right now. What you can control is you and we can’t sweep these issues under the rug and expect your relationship to work out.
After you have completed step 2 (or at least have made some significant, NOTICEABLE progress on it) contact your ex wife and ask her if it is possible that the two of you could get together. This is just a simple get together, maybe over coffee at a favorite cafe.
Keep things light and casual. Don’t make it sound like this is going to be any type of serious discussion or you might well scare her away thinking it will end up in another fight. Your goal is to give her a brief glimpse of the new you so that she can see that you’ve changed. Hopefully the two of you really do have a chance to make things work together and we want her to begin to see that.
So there it is, pretty basic and simple – instructions, that is. I’m not trying at all to belittle the chore you have in front of you.
Any man who says “help me get my wife back” has to realize that you may be facing a difficult task.
Let me encourage you by saying that men just like you do succeed ALL THE TIME!
I have talked about this more than once with my friend, T.W. Jackson, the author of the very successful relationship advice package “The Magic Of Making Up“. He sees this happen nearly every single day, so I want to assure you that getting your wife back IS possible much of the time.
Women do not always know what they want – and frankly, men don’t always either. And that is why these 3 steps I have outlined above can be successful all on their own.
If you do decide you want more high powered techniques, though, then take a look at The Magic Of Making Up and get some real heavy duty tactics on your side.