If you know that a particular friend or family member dislikes your ex, ask to sit down and discuss why. Find out if it is based on how the ex treats you or others, knowledge your friend may have that you don’t, or other evidence that might be meaningful.
Reading your blog makes me feel so much stronger to survive each day and to heal after being in a emotionally hot-and-cold relationship with a person (who was clearly a narcissist!) and has hurt me so much. Love this, your words have truly healed a traumatic year xx
A hand written letter is a great way to contact your ex right after you’ve finished no contact. A hand written letter stands out in this age of digital technology. Of course, you can use an email as well.
Well, you should try to open yourself to new horizons, the world is a really large place, and humans seem so little in it… Maybe you should try to find some good in another person, explore new skies, new ways of living, maybe you’ll find someone that can feel better in your life than your previous boyfriend/girlfriend but if not, well, I should tell you, that if they broke up with you they aren’t worth, because all humans are amazing in their own way, and so are you, so find someone to share that amazingness with, and be happy, I’m sure you’ll do it, life is more than sticking yourself to one person, specially when they left you, probably when you most needed him/her. That’s all I have to say! Continue being a beautiful human.
GO OUT. I don’t care if it takes all of the strength that you have to get out of that onesie of yours, put the Netflix and the Nutella and the phone away, take a f-ing baby wipe shower if you’re too depressed to shower (yes, I’ve been there) and drag your baby-wiped butt out into the fresh air, get out and BREATHE.
I asked him about the contradiction today on why he wants to be alone but then next year might start dating and he just said that after his trip he might start dating other people and I might too. I don’t know if I should stick to my plan of waiting a year and then going for it or if I should start as a distant friend next year so that we migr rekindle. I’ve read the articles about being friends and he has plenty of times said he only wanted to be friends but then changed his mind again to wanting to be with me. I just don’t know if I should start in the position of friends and not go through a year seperate because he did say after 5 years he could see something?
You couldn’t do anything about it then, but now you can. Flirt with these guys. Call them up or meet them. Speak to them, and tell them you’ve broken up with you guy. Trust us, these guys would make you feel like the princess you deserve to be. And you’ll actually end up having a great time! [Read: How rebound relationships can help you heal from the breakup]
Kevin, we broke up 8 days ago. Since then, I have messaged him everyday constantly and he barely replies. I have to text him a hundred times before he replies just once. I really love him and want to be with him, but I don’t understand why he is acting like this. He said he loved me and then suddenly this.
At first I planned to have NC for 45 days because I was really clingy and begging for him to come back. But now I have been thinking about cut it down. What do you think? It means I will finish NC next Wednesday after 30 days NC. I wanna see how I will feel then. I think I feel much better now. I am not depressed as I was a month ago. I started a few new hobbies. I have learned a lot of things about relationships via this website and I wanna used them to re-build attraction on him.
Situation 1– You broke up with your ex, realized you wanted him back but found out that he got a new girlfriend after the breakup. If you are in this situation then you are free to go ahead and try to get your ex boyfriend back.
Allow yourself to heal and forget about all the negative things that happened to you before. Note that you will have a hard time getting back together and attaining success when attempting to give romance a second chance if you do not truly forgive each other.
All I can say is, I am simply moving on with my daily responsibilities and new interests and hobbies (previously discouraged by my ex wife). I still love her dearly after she declared she no longer loved me 18 months ago :-(. The distraction of hobbies and interests is like a Panadol but new skill acquisition requires daily practise so they are a regular distraction. I signed up for an online course, regular homework and further distraction. These things are enjoyable even though I am using them as a distraction. I was told I couldn’t dance if my life depended… Read more »
The date went very well (she did most of the talking) and we went to a few places afterwards. Eventually, she dropped a hint that she wanted to go to her apartment. While there we had plenty of alone time and she put herself in multiple situations where things could happen but was not exhibiting any obvious signs. She did this the rest of the night and it confused the hell out of me.
on. I noticed he was withdrawing more and last night he sent me a text that he wants to break up .. We had a good relationship as friends but us getting closer is ruining that.. He wants go back to us being friends… We did talk and he said it’s not me .. He doesn’t feel mentally or memotionally prepared to be in a relationship with anyone.. But it’s killing me and I don’t believe that it wasn’t me… If he liked me still he would want to be with me.. He said he really wants to go back to friends and see what happens in the future.. I think he’s just telling me this appease me .. I don’t know what to do .. I’m having a hard time with this .. I feel like I may have pushed too hard and he just wants away from me
I wish that I could help, but I have too much to say to type it all out and not enough hands to type or hours in the day. I would also need more details. This is why I cannot give specific advice in the comments. I do offer coaching if you’re looking for specific help.
Losing someone is hard especially those who mean so very much to us. It’s important to give yourself time to heal whether that’s a week, a month, a year or sometimes longer. Try focusing on positive goals and things that are good in your life instead of negative emotions, but when those negative emotions hit it’s important to let yourself feel them and then move on. Instead of focusing on your past, try to look towards the future and what new adventures lie ahead.
Finally, it’s important to minimize the amount of time with your ex. In particular, try to avoid is doing attachment-related things together, which is anything where emotions run particularly high or low. You’ve had a crappy day and need to vent? Don’t call your ex. Something amazing just happened and you can’t wait to share it with someone? Don’t call your ex! Try to find other people who can fill that space in your life instead, and it will really help you to move on emotionally.
If you don’t want to leave anything to chance or risk another woman swiping him from under your nose while he’s still single, or if you just want to ramp things up to the next level, then I invite you to learn the three fastest ways to melt a man’s heart.
You’re young.. It’s normal that his parents wouldn’t want their child to date or doesn’t think he should be because you’re both young, especially if they’re religious.. Like being overly emotional, that indicates you can’t handle a relationship yet.. If you really want to prove you’re a responsible kid.Be responsible. Focus in learning and improving yourself in as many aspects as you can because you have the time. Don’t rush things.
Of course, trying to learn how to get your ex boyfriend back the wrong way doesn’t have to be so dramatic. Simply emailing him two weeks after the breakup to ask if he has your electric toothbrush can be enough to sway things out of your favor.