– Know when it’s time to let go. You have to know when it’s time to throw in the proverbial towel. If he isn’t into it, he isn’t initiating, he isn’t starting anything back up after a certain amount of time, just forget it and really move on. You can’t force anyone to feel a certain way about you. If you are your best self and enjoying your life and he doesn’t come back, then there is nothing else you can do or could have done. At least now you’re in a solid place, and this will increase your chances of finding lasting love with the right guy for you.
What should I need to do ? I am on day 8 of no contact it’s really hard specially I am seeing him online all the time. We’ve been together for 7 years. But recently for the past 2 years we do not see each other in person due to long distance tho we’ve been seeing each other in webcam. We had some argument he keeps telling we are going to see each other in person but he never make plan. I find out Jan 1st this year he traveled to Dubai to spend vacation with Indonesian girl.(before that incident I caught him sexting with that girl, that Indonesian lady asking him to send her a porn he said they haven’t see each other yet and the girl was virgin he said it was nothing ugh I’m so stupid to believe)
What you’re sharing with your girls he is more than likely just stomaching and telling the majority of his friends that everything is “all good.” He definitely remembers the good things about your relationship as well as the bad, we all do. The mood we are in when reflecting back is what controls the perspective. Meaning, if you can have him in a positive head space and not a negative one while you approach him looking for reconciliation, you’re much more likely to trigger memories of a pleasant nature rather then unpleasant memories.
You probably already know who I am, but for any new viewers out there, my name is Amy North… I’m a women’s dating coach from Canada, and I’m the owner of CoachNorth.com, my popular ladies-only website featuring free relationship guidance videos.
Here is the way to jump start the flow again. Sit down and write a letter to him from the heart. Then put it in an envelope and give it to him. This will open him back up to wanting to talk with you again.
Over the past 4 months, we’ve hung out every weekend, although I’m always the one to initiate communication and making plans. When we’re together, the intimacy is there and It’s like we’re a couple again. He never texts or calls- unless he’s replying to my texts and he takes hours or days to respond. I feel if I never contacted him, I’d never her from him again and it’s strange because he doesn’t seem to have an issue making plans to hang out and stick with them in advance.
You are an incredible person and no breakup can take that away from you. Get out of bed and begin to radiate as much awesomeness as that sun that you had shut out. A breakup is like a demon that sucks life out of you – a dementor, if you will. And how you can kill it is by self-reflection, reinvention, and rejuvenation of your old self, and a growth into an even better version of yourself.
The whole point of No Contact is to avoid conversations with her, general or relationship wise until you feel more sorted out emotionally to deal with things rationally. The only conversations that is encouraged is if it’s a serious issue (financial matters, divorce paperwork, children, etc). You should tell her that you would like some space since the relationship has ended to work on yourself.
If you are afraid you are going to end up alone I want you to take a massive action and go out and date more people when you are ready. Don’t let your breakup with your ex affect you to the point where you actually believe this non sense of “No one loves me.”
Most importantly of all, if you actually want to stand any chance of getting your ex-boyfriend back in your arms again one day, you have to take your level commitment from interested to committed to do whatever it takes to bring him back.
Show him you’ve changed. Take advantage of your time together as friends to show him how you’ve been working on improving yourself. For example, if it used to drive him crazy that you were always late, make a point of showing up for your outing a few minutes early.
It’s been 3 months since the divorce, we’ve not contacted one another but I feel so lost. I’m trying to forget. I know it will take time but I’m finding really hard to accept the way I’ve been treated. I didn’t deserve this ill treatment.
I don’t believe she has moved on.. after our break up we were still incontact an evan meet up for dinner ect. Its been just over 2 weeks she has asked me to concentrate on myself and make successful positive changes and she not making commitments for a relationship at this stage. How long should u wait until i make contact via email and how to write a letter and what to say? Regards Theo
Hey Ryan! So we have continued texting after the last time I told you about (the phone call where he said he felt pressured and another time to catch up since I was going away) I text him saying I was going away and he said have a lovely trip and take some piccies(photos). He said he had a nice Xmas but is a little sunburnt. I text him a photo a few days later while I was away and he replied in 1 minute saying omg that looks amazing where are u? I didn’t reply and he then sent me a message on 1st of January saying happy new year I replied later that day saying hey! Just watched a house of cards, reminded me of you, made me smile! He replied within 2 minutes saying 🙂 too hungover to physically smile but that’s a nice thought! I had a bad experience where someone tried to break in my house so I called him early that morning then I realised I shouldn’t have done that so I sent a text saying just an update I’m safe now, at my friends place. He then replied saying glad you’re safe, you are better off calling the police if you feel unsafe. Then later that day I text him saying I’m still feeling a bit shaken by it would you be up for a phone call, he replied saying sorry I don’t feel like talking in the phone at the moment but don’t let this dampen your new year, there are plenty of jerk guys in the world, just be you and love it! I replied saying I understand and did u have a good day he replied yeah, did a lot of furniture moving and sent me a photo of what he had changed in his room. After that it was his birthday so I sent a message saying happy birthday! He replied within the hour saying 🙂 thanks lady! I didn’t reply and have started no contact as I feel when i am a bit distant he replies instantly kind of thing. I was thinking to continue no contact until around the 16th of January which would mean I haven’t texted him since the 4th of January. In my text on the 16th of January I was planning to say if he’s free to catch up for a quick cuppa sometime this week? I don’t want to do the wrong thing since I have asked before, but he is a big introvert and he rarely ever asks anyone to catch-up even friends/family. They usually ask him. My only fear is that he has said yes he’d like to catch up but wants to find his own feet first, he said this in December though. What would u recommend?