If you don’t believe in the no contact rule then all I can say to you is that you had better start believing in it. Remember above when I said I spent a lot of time researching this topic? Yea well, I only took a look at credible sources and every one and I mean EVERY SINGLE ONE recommends the no contact rule.
This is the power of jealousy. Now, I am NOT recommending that you go out and date someone new. I am recommending that you drop certain hints in your communication with your ex boyfriend that you are out meeting new people. The key to this is that YOU CAN’T BE OBVIOUS. Do you think you will get very far if you rub the fact that you are out and about with other guys? The answer is no. There is a subtle art to incorporating jealousy texts into your conversations and I am going to teach you that art.
My ex boyfriend & I have dated for 1 yr 8 months.we study on same campus & we moved in together after an year of dating.on the month of August we were on holiday.one evening we were chatting as usual then he happened to talk to me in a rude way.i then corrected him but he insisted tht he wasn’t rude & tht he won’t apologise.i got so angry and decided to keep quite.the following morning ,with no bad intention i called him and asked him why he wouldn’t admit his mistake.this resulted in2 the worst urguement ever.he said that i only complain abt his mistakes &only focus on his bad side, that i don’t appreciate him.we stayed without talking until the holiday was over.we reported back to sch on sep and told me he want us to break up & move on as grown ups.i insisted that he should give me a chance to correct my mistakes.he then said i didn’t do him any wrong.he gave a reason tht the r/ship wasn’t working.deep down me i knew things weren’t right & so i started working on myself.i bought him an expensive gift to show that i appreciate him.he accepted the gift bt told me that he wanted to live his life the way he want & party alone with his male friends.i let him do that &supported him by paying for the night-outs since he wasn’t well financially.i did that because I wanted him happy.that has been going on for a month.but he hasn’t changed his mind about the break up.he said that we should live separately and actually he has started looking for his own house.yesterday he went ahead & deleted my photos from his instagram.i got angry & asked him about it.he became rude & bitter saying that we r nt dating anymore &told me to move on.when i ask him for a second chance to become a better girlfriend he insists that I’ve not done him any wrong.he says he don’t want to date,he don’t want any girl in his life,he don’t want anything to do with love.he says there are many things he want with his life &that he wants to be on his own.i feel so much pain.i’ve given up on him.actually I’ve hurt so much while fighting for him &convincing him to stay.im so broken and I’ve told him that he will never hear again from me.why is he doing this?whats happening? Will he ever come back or want to be in a relationship with me again?help me please.thanks
You first have to understand if him saying that you’re unable to focus on your career is a legitimate worry he has or if it’s an excuse to end things. That would determine if you should contact him, because if it’s a real concern he has, and you are able to convince him that you can stay focused and still be with him, then you should try to fix things.
Then you are still suffering from post-breakup denial and bargaining. Denial and bargaining are two of the many stages of grief after a breakup. It’s extremely common for people to want to get their ex back after a breakup. However, it’s not always the right choice.
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She left it got very messy on account emotions were running high. She always said I deserved to be happy and that I wasn’t happy with her. She always referenced an ex she thought I was more in love with. Shes even told people that me and that ex have gotten back together. She said this made her miserable and why she always fought with me. She hasn’t deleted me off of her facebook but she is making it very hard on me in general. She messages me when she seems to need something, and attaches other things to those messages about being happy for me that I’m happy…etc. She tells everyone she is happier now that she is gone. Why stay in contact every now and then, and why keep my photos up on FB if she was not still thinking in some way. I’m giving her space and not contacting her. I did well enough to let her know how I feel and I’m working on me and doing things that make me happy. I want her to realize I can be the man she needs and that I was happy the whole time, with her.
It is essential that you talk about experiences that your ex enjoyed. A lot of people screw up because they only talk about stuff that they miss. Make sure you are talking about stuff that your ex misses as well. Here is a good example of how this should be done.
I had a guy whom we dated for 8 months then all over a sudden he started saying that I was cheating on him.he broke up with me saying that he never wanted anything to do with me.I pleaded with him to hear me out but he refused…I begged him to no avail,so I decided that I will never contact him….after 2 months of no contact we meet on a certain place….at first he didn’t talk to me then after like 20 min he came to where I was n started to talk to me….we talked for like 30 mins then he was supposed to attend to something. So he asked me for my contact and told me that we will communicate bt its now the third day and he haven’t contacted me…..so should I contact him or not??? Pliz advice
Ok thanks Ryan! Also we had a phone call recently just chit chat, it was a pleasant phone call I meantioned that I’m going away at the end of the week and if he wanted to see me, he said he feels pressured? And he doesn’t know, maybe another time then? I don’t know what he’s trying to communicate to me, as we’ve been texting for around a month and a phone call last night. At the end of the phone call we said it was nice to hear your voice and he said it was nice to hear your voice too. He sounded really depressed. I’m not sure if he needs more time? I’ve always been a go getter and he’s more relaxed and goes with the flow. could you explain what he means by pressured? Do I just give more time? My gut instinct and the way he sounded on the phone told me he missed me? Thanks
ExposingLove.com is a relationship advice website that has helped many women in difficult situations with their love lives – to reach a place of calm and happiness with their very own Mr. Right. Though each situation is different, most of the advice on this website can be applied.
You guys weren’t together for a long time so him moving on would be dependent on how meaningful the 2 months were. Typically someone blocking you would be his way of wanting to avoid you, and this could because you were acting needy by trying to change his mind. Continue with NC but spend this time to work on your issues, and at the end of it, if he has unblocked you, you could try initiating contact to see where he stands. Bear in mind that there is a small likelihood he has moved on already due to the length of the relationship, and may have blocked you as a way of ‘indicating’ those feelings.
Start by not contacting him any further. Apply No contact to give yourself some distance from the situation and to give him space. Spend this time to work on yourself and improve your life. Right now he is dating someone else, and you should not interfere, because it will lead to him thinking you’re desperate and start getting annoyed or resentful towards you. If you really want to be with him, you’ll have to wait until he contacts you first, or if they break up. Doing anything now related to him will only push him further away from you.
You are right that you may not be able to use the good memories from your past relationship in rebuilding attraction with him. But that is only a small part of the plan. The biggest thing that attracts an ex back is the changes you make in yourself. If you can show him that you have truly changed and are a new person after you have finished no contact, you can definitely attract him back. Read this article for more info on what to do after no contact.
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It is because our emotions are the ones guiding us when we are in relationships, and if you would like to know for sure whether your ex will come back to you or not, you need to use only your emotional intelligence.
She hasn’t moved on as far as I am aware but made signs that she was starting to get used to being “single” Therefore I consider this point in time the final attempt to salvage. I have dug deep and think she is worth it but want to avoid a repeat. She Will not firmly say it is over and avoids all discussion and attempts to get third party assistance or support. She still states she did nothing wrong. I think there could be undiagnosed mental health issues as the theme throughout the relationship has been there, just not quite right.
The Myers-Briggs Personality Inventory groups personality types into four major groups: The artistic and adventurous Artisans, the analytical and intellectual Rationals, the diligent, responsible Guardians and the passionate, emotional Idealists.
And that’s when you contact them, you talk to them and then meet them. Just as they lay eyes on you, BOOM. That’s the new and improved you. YOU version 2.0. They can’t help but wonder what brought so much positive change in you.
If you’ve done your homework correctly, you will be oozing confidence and attractiveness out of every inch of your body. And this works doubly as effective on your ex than any other person. Why? Because they were already attractive to you at one point in time. And you are not a stranger to them. You are someone familiar who looks very attractive.
I’ve rarely seen a marital split where both parties aren’t equally responsible, in their own ways. That said, because of the way our society looks at sex, when there’s an affair, all the blame seems to fall on the active affair partner. We have not come so far from The Scarlet Letter.
Remember when your ex left you? They thought of you as a needy, clingy and desperate person with little to no self-respect. After not being in contact with you for a while, they must be wondering what the heck happened to you. They will slowly start to forget that image of yours (the needy desperate one) and start remembering the things they liked about you. They will start remembering the things that they found attractive in you.
I don’t need to explain this one do I? Ok, basically this is a tactic where you tell your ex boyfriend what you miss about your relationship. Be careful though because these messages need to be worded properly or your screwed.
(You want to give them something to chew on. They will be thinking about what’s happening in your life and will want to call or text you to talk about it. You are using curiosity to get your ex contact you. Of course, something must be happening in your life. That’s why creating a positive change in your life is absolutely important before contacting your ex.)