Keep Your Marriage Fun & Alive
The idea of using a “Date Night” to keep your marriage fresh and couples together is quickly becoming an American institution. Spending a special night together without kids or distractions can do miracles to put the spark back into fading marriages or simply keeping the home fires from burning out altogether.
What we have noticed, though, is that many couples are forgetting what date night is really about. For most married couples, after a few months date night hardly resembles a date at all; it’s more like an obligatory company meeting minus the free food!
Now once upon a boring time, I used to live in the boondocks, so I know what it’s like to try to find something interesting, let alone exciting, for date night. What we see is that instead of taking the initiative and seeking out new and exciting date night ideas, whether they live in the city or country, many couples fall back on a few old standbys.
Once in a while, these standard date night activities are just fine. We all like familiarity once in a while. However, when these types of “dates” become the normal routine for your weekly night together, it takes the fun and excitement out of date night completely.
OK, so we have identified the problem, what about some solutions?
Here Are 3 Ideas To Spice Up Date Night and Your Marriage
1) Take Turns Planning Your Date Night Activities
Many times the wife is tasked with being the “social planner” of the marriage. But if one person is left doing all the planning, things can get old really quickly. That one person might even resent never getting “surprised” herself.
Perhaps more importantly, it doesn’t place all the pressure on the shoulders of one of you if the “burden” is shared. And that’s what marriage is all about, right, sharing some burdens occasionally?
The ultimate benefit though is that you’ll be able to try new things you may never experience if one person does all the planning. Maybe the woman is a stay at home mom while dad goes to work. Are there others at work that dad can get ideas from? Being “busy at work” is no excuse to never have to plan date night.
Some date night events will be hits, others will be misses. The key is that both of you plan with mutual enjoyment of the evening in mind and be willing to cut the planner some slack if it doesn’t turn out to be the best night out ever.
2) No Repeat Schedule
How often you “repeat” the same date night activity will depend on several factors, such as:
- How often you have date night; not all couples can make every week work for a variety of reasons
- Where you live and how many good options you have for date night in the first place
- The amount of money you can afford to allocate to date night activities
But a rule of thumb might be no repeat of weekly date nights in a two month period of time. If you go out less frequently, maybe a 3 month period is more appropriate.
This doesn’t mean that you cannot eat at the same restaurant for two months, though that would certainly be nice as well. What it does mean is that you should avoid repeating the same exact date experience (dinner and a movie, date night in, picnic theme, etc.) in the “no repeat” period of time.
We fully understand this can be a bit of a challenge, but the rewards are worth it. Exercising your creative muscles on a regular basis will make the task easier.
3) Look For Ways To Make it Fun!
This might seem like an obvious tip, but let’s face it, it needs to be repeated – and maybe often.
Consider that date night doesn’t have to take be at night and you do not have to act like stodgy grown ups. There are plenty of fun ways to bring on a little romantic fun for the two of you.
Consider some of these ideas:
- Race car experience
- Hot air balloon ride (we even had those in the boondocks)
- Tandem sky diving
- River walk
- Bungee jumping (not my pick)
- Paint ball
- Laser tag
- Roller skating/blading
- Snow skiing
- Ice skating
- Rock climbing, even indoor rock walls
- Minor league sporting event (we have a great team in Austin, but those are OFTEN in the boondocks)
- College sporting event
- Water skiing
- Jet skiing
- Four wheeler riding
- Horseback riding
- Music concert (Keep an eye out for free concerts, or even a Summer ice cream social)
- Wine tasting/tours
- Pottery/Painting (No judging each others work, praise & [mutual] laughter only!)
Sure, many of these cost money, but don’t forget the possibility of game nights at home or maybe a “double” date night once in a while with some friends. That can really mix it up.
These are many excellent date night choices that don’t cost an outrageous amount of money (some on the list DO cost a bunch, I get that) and can be a ton of fun for both of you. You don’t have to go out of the way, or even off the beaten path to find great date night experiences you’re sure to cherish.
With so many exciting options available, date night should never be boring again.
One thing that can result in a repeat date night or a boring one, is last minute planning.
Avoid that problem by planning in advance, of course, but also make a couple of “shelf plans”, date night ideas that you can do most any time (not reliant on weather, for example) that you can have on the shelf ready to grab if one or the other of you drops the ball in planning one week.
That “backup” plan can also save an argument! Just remember to re-stock the “shelf” after you do use it.
Another idea is to look back in your own dating history to times that really stand out as fun for both of you. It’s always good to recreate special experiences for celebrations such as birthdays and anniversaries too.
Where We Get Our Best Ideas
Some of our best ideas come to us when doing other things, like mowing the lawn or even in the shower (alone…). But many of the relationship tips we have picked up from this important relationship resource. Check it out, you’ll be glad you did.
What is your best date night idea? Please post it below in the comments.