Fix Your Relationship
Nobody really likes breaking up. In almost all cases, at least one of the parties didn’t feel ready to leave the relationship behind yet and this person is often left heartbroken and depressed. Unfortunately, there is no 100% guaranteed way to get an ex back. After all, human beings have complex emotions.
However, if you genuinely feel that the relationship can be salvaged, and that the breakup is not because of a permanent problem but rather something that can still be resolved, then the following tips may be of benefit to you.
The No Contact Rule
There are thousands of self-help programs online and in book stores on how to get back with an ex. Almost all of these programs cover the no contact rule, and it applies to men and women alike.
“The No Contact Rule- No texting, talking or stalking your ex for a full month. That is 30 days of essentially cutting your man out of your life. Remember, don’t dig into his life and don’t Google + or Facebook him.”
There are reasons why the no contact rule is important. Firstly, there is the fact that during the first 30 days after a breakup, you will be driven by emotions of hurt and anger, not of love. Secondly, when you do not contact your ex, he or she will be wondering why. This will keep you alive in your ex’s mind, which is very important if you are to get him or her back.
Make Positive Changes to Yourself
During your 30 no contact days, you need to take the opportunity to improve yourself and look after yourself. If you will be wallowing for 30 days in a darkened room, eating nothing but pizza and forgetting to shower, you will not be desirable when you present yourself to your ex again. You must take this opportunity to do something with your life.
“Being a happy and confident person is probably the most important thing when it comes to getting your ex back. You need to realize that happiness and confidence is something that you can get by working on yourself.”
Do also focus on your physical appearance. Have a new haircut and get some fresh clothes. Meditate, go out with friends, and write in a journal. This is not about hiding from the feelings of grief you are experiencing, but more about facing them and dealing with them.
After spending a month analyzing your feelings and working on yourself it is time to act. You should now be aware, for instance, about things that you have done wrong in the relationship that you can improve on as well. This is the moment to reconnect with your ex. What is of vital significance is that this is not seen as a date or way to get back together.
“Just say you want to “catch up” or “hang out together”. Try to keep it short, like a lunch or coffee. The date has to be in setting where you can leave easily if you sense that things are going south.”
The first time you reconnect with your ex should remain light. If the relationship does come up, then think about the things you can own up to in terms of having done wrong. Taking responsibility is very important. Ideally, this won’t come up until you meet up again. Then, slowly but surely, you can build on finding that original attraction back again.
Use your no contact period carefully. It is an opportunity to improve who you are. You may even find out during that period of time that you don’t want your ex back after all.